Haven
Isat in the back pew under an eave, where I couldn’t be seen unless someone was really looking my way. I’d wanted to leave the church, but I wanted to make sure Ryker and my father didn’t get into a brawl.
If it weren’t for that, I would have hightailed it out of there and driven as far away from Lakemont as I could. The idea of attending an out-of-state university suddenly became appealing. It wasn’t too late either. The semester didn’t start until tomorrow.
But I wasn’t a quitter, and I wouldn’t give my father that satisfaction.
I moved both my knees up and down as I listened to Ryker and my father. Their voices carried through the mainly empty church.
People had left after paying their respects. I suspected that most of them were headed to the cemetery. I’d heard Lucas tell someone that it would only be a few minutes before they carried the caskets out to the four hearses that were parked outside.
I didn’t plan on going to the cemetery. Father and I had plans to head back to his ranch for dinner, and after the interaction between Ryker and Father, heading to the cemetery definitely wasn’t a good idea. Plus, as infuriated as I was that Ryker was using me to get to my father, I would probably deck the jerk.
To think that I’d kissed him on the cheek and offered him a shoulder to cry on.
Stupid me.
I was smarter than that. I knew he wasn’t worthy.
Yet there I was, ready to throw myself at him. I knew how death had gripped me by the neck and sunk its claws in so deep that I hadn’t been able to breathe when my mother had died. I knew firsthand how the pain stayed for a long time. That shock, denial, and all the emotions that came with death never went away.
The more time that passed, the more I wanted my mom alive. If she were there, then my father might not have been such a bastard. I hated how he lived so carefree and easily, like he’d never known her or loved her, like he had never been married to her. I didn’t believe in dragging out the grieving process, but my father never talked about my mom. Arlene was partly to blame, and I couldn’t fault her too much. She was his life now, but so was I.
If he loved me, he would want the best for me. But my father was all about himself. All that mattered was politics and sticking it to people he didn’t like.
Bastard.
It was clear he didn’t like Ryker, and now I knew why. From their conversation, I’d gathered that my father had stuck his nose into the James’s family business. I would bet that whatever had transpired had benefited my father or his election. But there were always two sides to every story.
Ryker stormed down the aisle with his shoulders hunched, his face pinched, and his gray eyes swirled with fury. When he got to my row, he stopped and turned as though he could sense me.
Hot rage jumped off him as he slipped into the row and dropped his big body down beside me. He spread his legs in that manly way that guys did when they sat down, and his leg brushed mine.
Immediately, my pulse ramped up.
“Your father is a piece of work,” he whispered.
“What did he do?” As irritated as I was with Ryker, my tone was even.
I watched Father talk to the handsome man dressed in an expensive suit. Father smiled and nodded, being as polite as he could. Underneath that grin, though, was nothing but boredom.
“Fucked with my old man’s business.” Ryker spat the words through clenched teeth.
“I’m sure my father had a good motive.” I wasn’t taking sides, but when it came to voters and elections, my father wanted to deliver on his promises.
“You would say that,” he said.
“I heard something about the environment.”
“My old man’s company lost millions of dollars, employees, and customers, all because your father stuck his nose where it didn’t belong.”
“And you know this for sure?” I asked.
“What I know is your old man talks a big game about jobs, the economy, and the environment. But if he keeps submitting bills that hurt the businesses that support the moneymaker, as in oil refineries, he won’t win his election.”
I didn’t get involved in my father’s bills or politics. I didn’t even help him with elections. Actually, he’d never asked me, and I had never offered. I’d never had the desire.
But I didn’t want to talk about my father or politics. Actually, I didn’t even want to talk to Ryker, but I did have one question for him. “Why are you using me?”
