We lay in each other’s arms long into the night.
The problems I had were the ones I would face in the morning. Right now, all I needed or wanted was this.
14
Percy
The morning came way too quickly. I wanted to stay snuggled in Ben’s arms, but I did have a business to run. Tammy Sue could do a lot, but the baking was mainly me. She could make the cookies and cupcakes, but everything else required me to be there.
Ben was so warm. Pressed up against his hard body was my new happy place, but this was what it was, right? I couldn’t begin to think that this was a forever kind of thing, no matter what sweet words he might say. He didn’t live here. Sure, it wasn’t really that far, but it was still a very long distance. One night was not a real future, and I needed to screw my head on straight. If I didn’t, I would start imagining us adopting two kids and going to Little League games together.
It would be so easy to fall into that fantasy.
I had wanted it for so long. I was now here, and it felt too easy. He looked at me – he touched me like it mattered. When would the other shoe drop? Where was the event that would change everything once again? I watched way too many movies.I just wanted to snuggle closer. But I couldn’t. I had a business that I couldn’t ignore.
It would be too easy to fall.
It was early, and I slipped out of his bed as carefully as I could. He shifted as I scooted out of his arms and curled into a ball. I didn’t want to wake him. If I did, I didn’t see how I could pull myself away. One glance from him, and I would want to feel him inside me again. I was already late, but I so wanted him to turn over and hold out his hand for me to slide back into bed with him.
I had baking to do and a life I had to get back on track. Nothing could be put before saving my business, not just from the corporation that wanted to buy it but from running it into the ground myself. I had purchased the oven by digging deep into my savings, and I knew that hurt. I had stolen from myself over and over again to keep the bakery running, and I couldn’t continue down that path for much longer. Something had to shift.
No matter how much I wanted to stay safely in his arms, this was not something that he could help with. I slipped my clothes back on and was glad that we showered last night before we went to bed. I couldn’t kiss him goodbye because I wasn’t sure I could even say those words to him.
It would be too easy to fall?
I had already tripped.
I made sure my keys and wallet hadn’t fallen out of my pants as I slid them on. I had to scrounge around to even find my t-shirt, and I carefully opened the door and shut it quietly behind me.
It was better this way, even if it did feel like sneaking out. He’d understand when he realized I did have to go to work. But sleeping in his arms had felt safer than I had thought it would. We fit well together. It had just taken time for our piecesto harden for it to happen. We were now adults and whole individuals who knew who they were and what they wanted. I was still in shock that it was me he wanted. The world had shifted.
It would be too easy to fall. But I hoped he would catch me or we would fall together.
Life was weird.
But the idea of him was intoxicating.
I walked over to the bakery about an hour later than usual. Tammy Sue was already there, and I heard her banging around in the back as she tried to bake whatever she was struggling with. Cookies, probably.
“Hi,” I grinned as I walked into our kitchen.
“That is definitely a walk of shame. I think you have a clean t-shirt in the back room,” she giggled. “Did you have a good night?”
“It was good.” I couldn’t stop myself from grinning. The feeling of him was still within my body like an electric current that had no end.
“You somehow look even hornier. How the hell is that possible?”
“You’re hilarious.” I slid on my apron and walked over to wash my hands in the sink.
“I have Evelyn’s cookies already boxed up. So… Who did you do last night?”
“Why does Evelyn insist on coming before we’re even open? We really should tell her that she needs to pick them up the day before.”
“Evelyn’s gonna Evelyn. You can’t change a tiger’s stripes, hon. Now stop trying to change the subject and tell me about that dick.” She cackled happily. She was enjoying this way too much.
“You are so crass.”
“And you love it. Did you stay over at his place, or did you go to yours? I thought it was just going to be coffee.”
