I grinned. “I wouldn’t either. But I think we’re too set in our ways to live together. If I moved back home, I’d get my own place very close by.”
“Seriously, could you even walk away from being in the big leagues, honey? I’m not sure you could. It’s all you ever thought about. Would you be happy?” She slid another cookie over to me.
“I don’t know.” I reached over and grabbed it.
“Sometimes what you have is better than the unknown. Other times, maybe it’s not. You have to figure out what it is that you can live with. If you don’t love it – why would you be doing it?”
“It’s a stepping stone to… I don’t know. They may demand to keep me on contract, which would be idiotic. If they do, it’s either the bench, which I would refuse to do or this job. I… I don’t know.”
“What about your commercials? I love seeing you on my TV every now and then. Gracie down at the church said she started buying your razors just because it was you selling them.”
I groaned. “Oh, God. I don’t know. It depends, I guess. Dan thinks I can keep them for now, but they’ll dry up soon enough. I’ll just keep saving the money until it does, I suppose. He wants me to go on reality shows. Can you believe that?”
“Does he even know you? Who takes care of you, Jax? I mean not just your money – but you?”
“No one.” I shrugged, knowing it had been true for the last six years.
“That’s not an easy life, babe. Maybe that’s where you should start with making this decision. What’s actually best for you, as Jax Mason, the person.”
I admit she completely stumped me. What kind of life did I have to return to? If I chose to leave it all behind, would being back here be any better? Would I always regret not giving coaching a chance?
I walked outside and made a call.
I just hoped I was making the right call.
14
KENNY
“Hey, Dad?” I walked into Dad’s office and sat down on the chair. “What are you doing?”
“I am packing away what’s left of my life.” He looked around at the stacks of things all over his office.
“Wow! That sounds ominous. If that’s how you feel, why are you even retiring?” I laughed and leaned back.
“I owe it to your mother, and even I have to admit, I’m too old for this shit anymore. I love it, but it’s exhausting at my age. My feet hurt.”
“You’re not seventy.” I chuckled as I put my feet up on his desk. One of the great things about having a coach dad who regularly did the same thing.
“Not yet. But sixty-two and thirty-five years in the same job is a lot for any man. Between you and me, if I don’t start having the time to take your mother around the world, she’s going to murder me.”
“There has been a lot of talk about murder today.” I scrunched up my face. “Lisa made me promise to murder her if she became the new Ms. Jenkins.”
“Lisa’s too sweet to become her. Jenkins is one of a kind. She’s a robot.”
“I had dinner with Jax and his mom last night.” I offered slowly.
“Your mother told me.” He grinned widely. “I haven’t seen her in the last year. How’s she doing?”
“Seemed great. Same as always.”
“I’m glad that the two of you have patched this thing between you over. Makes me feel a whole lot better about leaving you here when we start going away. I hated it. I’ve missed the hell out of that boy, and honestly, I missed the son that I used to have. You’ve been a lot heavier without him.” I knew it was true. The last five or six years had been hard, and I had not been the same person. I had been nothing but sad and lonely, even when surrounded by other people. They hadn’t been my person – that had always been Jax.
“Yeah, things seem to be moving in a… good way. I’m just… Who knows what the future holds, I guess. If he’s there and I’m here – we’ll just have to figure it out.”
“He has always been crazy for you and needed you in a way that I don’t think you even understood back then. Jax felt alone. Loving you helped give him purpose, Son. His world revolved around you and baseball, and now that’s… Did he tell you? That’s not mine to share.” He crossed his arms and studied me.
“Yeah, he did.”
