She couldn’t quite regret the choice she had made—but she had never meant it to have this impact.
He couldn’t put this on for show. This is real. He isn’t trying to trick me.
The feeling that she had done wrong followed her when she left the study.
“You didn’t tell me Father would be coming to this,” Alexandra hissed.
Penelope had the decency to look embarrassed. “I didn’t know he would be,” she said. “Not when we last spoke.”
“You should have sent me a letter or something when the decision was reached.”
“You wouldn’t have come with me if you had known,” Penelope said.
“That’s right, I wouldn’t.”
“And I wanted you to come. I need you here with me, Alexandra.”
“You don’t. I escort you to these things because you have no one else to do that, but if I’d known our father was escorting you, I would have known I wasn’t needed. And if you’d told me you wanted him here instead of me, I would have accommodated you in that.”
She knew she was being too harsh, and she felt the shame of it when her sister looked stricken. “Do I really have to choose?” she asked Alexandra. “You’re both my family. Can I not have both of you? Will I always have to choose between you and Father?”
If it had been any other day, Alexandra would have found something kind to say. She would have reassured her sister that it didn’t really need to be that way, that she could make nice with her father for one day, at least.
But right now, his presence was like salt on a wound. She was too afraid to trust her husband because of her relationship with her father and her fear that every man would be like him. Hector had done nothing to indicate to her that he would be the same sort of man. Her elder sisters had learned to put their trust in their husbands, but Alexandra was having trouble overcoming this hurdle, and she resented him for that. Being in his presence today—it was painful.
Her father walked up alongside the pair of them. “It’s good to see you today, Alexandra,” he said. “I haven’t seen much of you since you were married. I’m so glad I was able to join you.”
“You shouldn’t have joined us,” Alexandra snapped. “I had this under control, Father. I don’t know why you’ve insisted on being here, but you shouldn’t be. You make our lives harder.”
“Alexandra!” her sister hissed.
But she shook Penelope off. “I want you to stay away from Penelope’s affairs. I want you to leave her to me. Because my worst nightmare is that she ends up as damaged by you as I have—afraid to let anyone love her for fear they turn out to be selfish and cold!”
Her father looked stricken. “Alexandra—I know that I haven’t been a great father. I’m sorry for that.”
She didn’t want his kindness. Not now. It made her feel worse about the fact that she had allowed her mistrust to make her hurt her husband.
She stormed away before she had time to register the way the words had hit her father. She had said more than she’d meant to, and she had no desire to see his reaction or hear any follow-up questions—from him or from Penelope—about what she’d meant by being afraid to let anyone love her.
She made her way out to a secluded place in the garden and found a quiet bench. Perhaps she could sit here and wait out the party until it was time to go home.
But it was not to be. The voice interrupted her solitude almost at once. “Good day, wife.”
The word caused her heart to leap in her chest. Had Hector come after all?
But she knew that was wrong, even before she turned. The voice was too low, too sinister. And when she took in his face, it was with dread, but not surprise.
Benedict Lennox.
She rose to her feet and took a step back, as if the terror that gripped her was something she could physically escape. Her whole life had been derailed the last time she had been alone with this man.
“You shouldn’t be here,” she told him. “We shouldn’t be together like this.”
“Why shouldn’t I be alone with my wife?” he leered. “Nothing improper about that.”
“Perhaps because I’m not your wife? Have you forgotten that you didn’t marry me?”
“Never mind. My claim to you stands,” Benedict said. “That bastard brother of mine should never have had my dukedom, and he shouldn’t have my woman either. I’ll be taking you with me now, as you were always mine.”
