He could still remember how soft she felt in his arms. No animal fur or hair could compare to that sensation. As he got into clean clothes, he had just enough strength to crawl into his bed. The last thought before he shut his eyes were of a pair of kissable lips. He whispered her name as he drifted off to sleep and wondered if those lips would taste as sweet in real life, as they would in his dreams.
Chapter Nine
“Brothers and sisters, let us pray.”
So ended the Sunday Service at church. Lauren was glad for once. Pastor Collins tended to preach a lot of hellfire and brimstone. She already had enough guilt to last a lifetime and she didn’t want to be reminded every Sunday about her sins.
Today, though, he seemed distracted. Several times during the message, he paused and then continued as if something other than the word of God weighed on his mind. When a few of the members gave discreet coughs, he’d jumped and thumped on the podium, going right back into the message as if he hadn’t stopped.
He did that several times during the service, and she wondered what could be distracting him. Pastor Collins had something on his mind. He was a hard man to feel sympathy for. She did recall how concerned he was when Christopher stopped her from going into the riverbank. Perhaps there was a softer side to the man. She let out a sharp cough, causing a few parishioners to turn to look at her. Murmuring her apologies, she tried to listen to the rest of the services with a reverent heart.
As everyone filed out of the church, a few of the women who had come to help her with the house came forward. They wanted to fawn over Esther once more, and Esther thoroughly enjoyed the attention. With a sigh of relief, she let one of the women take the child and Lauren slipped out the doors of the church to take in some fresh air. She stood at the bottom of the steps, her eyes closed, and lifted her face to the sky. The sun warmed her face and she smiled, basking in the glow. Her silence was disrupted when she heard her name being called.
“Mrs. Hale?”
She recognized that voice without having to turn around. When she pivoted around, she saw Christopher standing before her. “Dr. Spaulding. Did you enjoy the services?”
“Very much so. Pastor Collins is very…” he paused as if looking for the word to adequately describe the
“… enthusiastic?” she offered.
He smiled, and she felt a fluttering inside. “Yes, enthusiastic is a good word. How are you this morning?”
“I’m well, thank you. And you?”
“I am good.” He looked around at the people that were starting to come out of the church. “May I speak with you for a moment?”
She looked past his broad shoulder to see that Esther was surrounded by a group of women at the top of the steps. There were a few older girls who wanted to see the baby as well. Heather was there, waving Esther’s hand back and forth. Lauren lifted her hand to catch Heather’s eye and pointed to the area next to the church. With a deliberate dart between her and Christopher, Heather nodded.
“Sure. Let’s go over there.”
The fresh air stirred the wisps of hair along her temples as she basked in the sunlight. “It is a lovely day,” she said. Goodness, she hadn’t felt so well in a long time.
“You’re looking well,” Christopher said.
Her head dipped down. “Thank you.” She patted surreptitiously at her head. “You wanted to speak with me, Dr. Spaulding?”
“I think, Lauren, we’ve shared enough secrets for you to call me by my Christian name.”
His blue eyes stared down into her, the color almost rivaling the brightness of the morning sky above them. “Christopher,” she said. “You wanted to speak to me?”
“I did. I wanted to know if I could take you to Mrs. Taylor's home. There’s a new calf I helped deliver that I want you to see.”
Lauren wanted to see it. Or, rather, she wanted to be with Christopher. “I’d love to. Thank you for thinking of me.”
He nodded. “I thought you would enjoy it.”
“I think I would. Let me get Esther and then we’ll be on our way.”
A few moments later, they were in Christopher's two-seater buggy, Esther snuggly secured in her basket as they traveled the short distance to Millie’s house. They didn’t talk too much, but a comfortable silence was between them.
Even Esther wasn’t as fussy. She looked at the branches overhead and shadows of the trees as they passed, her tiny eyes soaking in every part of the new world for her.
Whenever her daughter was like this, Lauren loved her very much. She loved Esther when she was crying as well, it was just harder for her to feel motherly.
Clutching Esther’s basket closer to her in the buggy seat, she wondered if she were a bad mother. Did other women feel the same sort of frustration and irritation with their children? Did they ever want to be away from them? Esther gave her a toothless grin and blew bubbles as she waved her hand in the air.
Lauren leaned down and kissed Esther’s fingertips. Her baby looked so much like Jonah, it hurt her heart. Even though the pain was there, part of her was so glad that she did have Esther.
