"Why Rosie? Why wouldn't you let me be there for you? Is it because you blame me? Because I've thought about this, long and hard, for six years. If I could take that night back, I would. I fucking would."
I take a few steps closer to her. Our bodies are almost touching, but it's as if there's an invisible barrier between us, keeping me from touching her and closing the gap that separates us.
"I would take it back in a heartbeat, at any cost, if possible. I would do anything to change what happened, but I can't.—"
She cuts me off, her voice soft and just above a whisper, "I have never regretted you or that night together. I wouldn't take it back. It wasn't your fault."
She reaches out and cups her hand over my face, running the pad of her thumb over the apple of my cheek. I lean into her touch with a sigh.
"It isn't your fault either, V. You know that, right?" I ask as I cover my hand over hers.
She pulls her hand back and scoffs at my words with a shake of her head.
"I wish that were true, but it just isn't."
"Rosie, look at me,"
She shakes her head again, shifting her gaze to the ground just before softly closing her eyes.
Fuck this.
I close the gap between us and pull her into me, cupping her face with both hands. Touching her again causes all the years of memories we share to flood back in. I can tell she's relivingus,too.
"Fuck" I mutter as I lean in, and our foreheads rest against one another.
"I never thought I'd see you again, and now, here you are. I'm not just going to let you go."
She inhales a sharp breath. Then she runs her hands up and down my arms, taking her time.
"Why did you push me away? Why wouldn't you talk to me? Why wouldn't you let me be there for you?"
Tears fall from her eyes, landing on my hands that still run their paths over her cheeks, and I swipe each one away.
"After they died," She cringes as she says the words out loud, "I knew I couldn't be who you needed or deserved. I loved you so much."
The tears turn into sobbing as I take my hands and wrap them around her waist, pulling her into me until I'm practically holding her. She's crying so hard that she's barely able to get the words out. It kills me. I'm not trying to hurt her or make her relive this. I want to make sense of everything because I never could.
"The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you, but I knew the happiness you could give someone. I experienced it firsthand… It was beautiful. I knew that I couldn't give the same to you in return. All I've ever wanted for you was happiness."
Her words rip a hole in me.
"Why wouldn't you let that be my choice?" I ask, letting her go and taking a step back so that I can look at her. She tries to avoid my gaze, but I can tell she's holding so much back once our eyes meet.
"Damnit, Olivia, can't you just give me straight answers? I've waited all these years for them."
"There are no simple answers, Anderson! How do you not see that!" She snaps, yelling at me with a firm shove to my chest. It's not exactly what I intended, but seeing her stand her ground reminds me of the firecracker she's always been.
"Do you think it was easy for me? My entire life was changed dramatically in seconds. I lost everyone who mattered to me. I lost everything and everyone I loved wholeheartedly.That includesyou… Especially you." She pushes at my chest again.
"You think I wanted this for myself? For either of us? I did what I had to do!" She spins on her heels and turns back towards her porch.
Oh, hell no. She's not getting off that easily, not this time.
I grab her wrist and spin her back to me, wrapping one arm around her waist and pushing our bodies together as the other glides over her chin, angling her face to mine. She lets out a surprised gasp, and as her sweet breath coats over my skin, I come unglued and lose all self-control.
I crash my lips to hers, and there's nothing gentle about it. It's a kiss filled with greed, needs, and yearning. A kiss that I never thought I'd get. The best part is that she kisses me back. Our lips massage one another's. Then, without warning, hers slowly parted. I don't miss this invitation to deepen it.
She lets out a soft moan that I swallow without hesitation. Her hands make their way into my hair, knocking my hat off as she tugs my hair softly with one hand and claws at my neck with the other.
