“Going out?” he echoed, and Brett smiled at him and pressed one more kiss to his lips so that John couldn’t help but think about what Brett had said. His own cock was aching, now that he was paying attention, throbbing for release. He had been so fixated on Brett before that he hadn’t even noticed, but he was noticing now, and he wouldn’t at all mind giving Brett what he was demanding.
“Yes. We’re going to go out and do something together.” Brett tilted his head slightly as he searched John’s face. “If you want to, anyway. Find something Christmassy to do.”
It was a date.
The thought settled in John’s stomach like a stone, heavy and cold, but this was Brett. If any other man in the world had asked him out, John would have felt no compunction about telling him to get lost, that he didn’t swing that way. But Brett was different. Brett wasn’t someone that he could just blow off that easily.
Because he cared about the man, damn it. And maybe this, right here, was why it was a bad idea to have sex with your best friend. And in some way, he wanted to go. Other than a few runs to the grocery store, John had been inside the house for days.
Brett was still waiting, and John suddenly smirked. The truth was, he didn’t have it in him to destroy the hope that he saw in Brett’s face, because it echoed what he was feeling himself. It was probably going to end horribly, and he was probably going to lose the one person who meant anything to him, but for the first time, John allowed a novel thought to occur to him.
What if it didn’t?
What if, by some miracle, he and Brett could make something work, a relationship just as strong as the friendship which had lasted for years? What if he didn’t have to be on his guard, because it could really work?
It was crazy, and John gripped Brett by the head and gently guided it down to his throbbing cock. Yes, he would accept the blowjob, and yes, he would go out on this date, and if it went horribly, they would have their answer.
For the moment, though, at least, he was going to go with the theme of the season, and he was going to let himself choose hope. Just for now, anyway.
