“What is really going on, Yariel? Are you seeing anyone?” I asked, more sharply than I had a right to, as a dark and unfriendly thing unfurled in my gut at the thought of Yariel with someone else. At the very idea that another man would get to have him, like I’d only barely gotten to. The intensity of it shook me to the core. Because until this moment, I would’ve sworn on my life that I was not the jealous type.
His scoff should’ve been answer enough, but then it was his turn to look bitter. “No, Hatuey. There’s nobody else.” He sighed, looking up this time. I noticed this conversation involved a lot of him avoiding eye contact with me. “It’s too complicated. I can’t do complicated right now.”
I wasn’t going to yell. I told myself it was foolish to push for something I wasn’t even sure I could handle. Yariel was right: taking this further would not be simple. There would be fallout for him and for me, and I almost gave in. But this was Yariel, and it felt like a sin to not try. To not take this chance when it was being handed to us. “Just one last thing. And then we can go on this trip without me bringing it up again.”
“Fine.” He sucked his teeth and flexed his shoulders, bratty and moody like he got, and I hated the hot pool of want gathering in my gut from watching him.
“I loved it.” I said it looking straight at him. My eyes locked with his, holding them so he could see. “How you touched me, how you kissed me.” I discreetly let my hand snake down to my dick, which was rock hard by now. “And when you were inside me…” I closed my eyes when he groaned, a deep and needy sound. “Everything made sense. I want to do it again. Don’t you?”
He made a strangled noise, but I knew he wouldn’t answer. When he looked at me though…thatwas nowhere near a no. I opened my mouth to try and convince him that despite all the perfectly good reasons not to start something between us, last night had been a game changer.
Before I got a chance to, he sat up and pointed to something off where I couldn’t see. “Mary’s here.” His housekeeper. “See you at the airport.”
I guessed the conversation was over. “So you’re not going to say anything. We fucked and you’re unbothered by the whole thing,” I said, sounding hurt.
He laughed, and this time the slash of a smile on his face was so sharp it could cut. “If you knew the things I want to do to you. The ways I’d fuck you.” He looked down and then up again, as if searching the heavens for answers while his words made every muscle in my body tighten with need.
“Then why are you acting this way, Yariel?”
“Because I can fuck any guy I want, any time. There’s only one of you. And I would never do anything to mess with that.”
He ended the call, and I sat there staring at the dark screen. We would be in each other’s pockets for days. Private plane, luxury villa for just the two of us. I could already see it, him doing his best to act like he was made out of marble and me letting him get away with it. Not wanting to push his buttons. Letting Yariel shut it all down.
Well, fuck that.
If I was going to get four days with the only person in the world I seemed to want, I was going to shoot my shot. It took me all these years to figure out that stubborn bastard was my fucking soulmate, and I’d be damned if I was going to let him get in the way of me making him mine.
Chapter 3
Thursday
Hatuey
“I’m still gagged about how easy you’re taking all of this.”
I rolled my eyes at my friend Monserrat’s surprised tone as I sat in the back of the Escalade Yariel had sent to bring me to the airport.
“What do you expect me to do, Monsi? A,” I said, holding up a finger in the air. “He’s been my best friend forever, and he’s been out to me most of that time. So why would I be freaking out about having sex with him?”
I cringed when I heard the driver in the front seat make a choking sound. I couldn’t even say she was homophobic, because I would probably not be into hearing about a passenger’s sex life if I was trying to drive either.
So I lowered my voice as I went back to my rant. “B. I’m a grown man, and—” Monsi interrupted. I loved her, but she was rude as fuck.
“A grown man who as far as I know was straight and who had to be aware—or at least suspect a little bit—that your best friend has had the hots for you since tenth grade.” Monsi interrupted. I loved her, but she was rude as fuck.
She was screaming so loud by the last part, I had to hold the phone away. “Chill out, Monsi. Jesus. Does the whole of Santo Domingo need to know my business?”
I looked out the window and saw the exit for JFK, where Yariel was probably already waiting. I wasn’t sure, though, since he’d tacitly avoided all communication with me for the last forty-eight hours. The car had been there right on time, but I’d left my apartment later than anticipated. This morning I’d roamed around my place for hours, agonizing over what to pack, what to wear on the plane, and had made a last-minute run to the store to buy condoms and lube. I second-guessed myself on everything because I knew these next few days were my chance to talk some sense into Yariel. To get him to let down his guard for once.
“I just want to give us a chance before Yari shuts it down.”
Monserrat’s voice was a lot gentler the next time she spoke. “I’m not gonna lie—you're really blowing my mind with how chill you are.”
I could say I didn’t get it either, but that wasn’t true. I’d been waking up to my feelings for Yariel for years. “There’s not much to get, Monsi. Yari and I hooked up. I’m fine that it happened and really wish it would again. But he’s a stubborn asshole and has decided that he needs to protect my virtue.”
She scoffed at that. “Maybe he’s scared, Hatuey.” I smiled at how she said my name. Ahh-too-ey. After almost three years of living in the States, I’d gotten used to hearing my name pronounced in a hundred ways, but hearing it now was grounding. Reminded me of who I was, and I needed that. Even as Monsi was naming the things I’d avoided thinking about for the last forty-eight hours. “He doesn’t have the best track record with relationships, and he might be scared of starting something and messing up your friendship.”
“He knows he could never lose my friendship. If it doesn’t work, we’ll get over it. We can go back to how things were before. ” Even as I said it, I realized I sounded ridiculous. I wanted to believe we could overcome things not working out. But the newfound caveman in me, who only seemed to wake up whenever Yariel was in the picture, kept growlingmine, mine, mine. No matter what I told myself or Monsi, I already knew that giving Yariel up would not allow for a neat and tidy ending.
