I had no response—my mind still digesting the brokenness that was me—but he didn’t seem to mind. The tendrils of his power spiraled up my legs and yanked them open. I gasped and struggled to cover myself, but he took my hands and placed them on his forearms.
“You say you feel inhuman, like a doll, but that’s ridiculous. That’s what they see, but who gives a fuck about them? I want to show you what I see.”
With that, his hand plunged between my thighs, and I moaned as his finger traced over my clit. I arched against him, but the arm wrapped around my waist held me tight. “See how your body reacts to my touch, coming to life? That’s your humanity shining through, Estrella. No one can take that from you unless you let them.”
His finger plunged into me, and I swear my entire world shrank to the heat of his words and his touches. My eyes closed in pleasure, my nails digging into his arms hard enough to break skin. “See how you turn that pretty pink for me? It’s fucking beautiful.”
He pressed a kiss to my jawline. “Eyes on the mirror. Don’t close them.”
I fluttered my eyes open, and immediately I understood. My body writhed under his grip, shuddering and reacting to every touch like a livewire. My ragged breaths made my chest heave, and my face flushed with pleasure. I was a person with pain, pleasure, hate, and love, and no one could take that from me. My head fell back against his chest,the sight driving my ecstasy higher. He worked another finger in alongside the first, making my eyes roll back. A high-pitched moan tore from me.
“That’s it—you sing so pretty when I play you. Such a fucking good girl,” he purred.
Then he stopped suddenly, the loss of motion giving me whiplash. I whined, grinding against his palm in desperate search of friction. My efforts only made him laugh.
“Now, tell me what you want, Estrella.”
The sound of my name on his breath jolted through me like electricity, his voice caressing each syllable. It left me in shambles.
“You—”
“Ah-ah. No,” he interrupted, withdrawing his fingers only to push them deep down my throat. “I didn’t ask about me. I asked what you want. Not what you think I want, not what you think you should want. What do you, beautiful Estrella, truly desire? Use your words.”
His fingers released my tongue, taking hold of my jaw instead, cradling my head as he awaited my response. My mind reeled. It was a loaded question, especially in my vulnerable state, aching for release. I wanted so many things—most of which he couldn’t give me. He had to know that, yet the way he spoke made it feel as if he would move mountains for me.
I longed for a different world, a different life. I wanted safety—for myself and all the acolytes. I wanted to save them. I wanted the memories of my past wiped away and the evil scrubbed from my body. If anyone could understand, it would be Roman, but even he couldn’t grasp the entirety of my pain unless I showed him, and that wouldn’t help anyone.
Instead, I voiced what I knew we could both understand. “I want you to bite me, Roman. I want to remember what it feels like when it’sgood. I want yours to be the only mouth I remember.”
His gaze locked onto mine in the mirror, heat, understanding, and something else entirely filling those depthless eyes. He moved agonizingly slowly, trailing kisses up my neck to my jawline and back again. He slid his tongue over the bite mark and hummed. “Your wish is my command.”
He tilted my neck to the side while his other hand returned to my body, sliding inside me once more. Black curls spilled over my shoulder like ink, nearly obscuring his mouth on my neck. Warmth enveloped my skin as that sinful tongue wrapped over the back of my neck like a coiled snake, holding my head in place. Then he bit down.
I gasped, the sound swallowed by Roman’s high-pitched growl, more beast than man. The pleasure was nearly unbearable. This was nothing like Codran. This was heaven, and Roman was taking me there on obsidian wings, just like the angel of death I knew he was.
My moans deepened, my eyes rolling back. I wouldn’t last much longer in this complete, utter bliss. He broke away, his body shuddering with restraint. A trickle of my blood trailed down his stained lips. He licked it away, his eyes rolling back in ecstasy. Then his tongue met my neck, savagely lapping up the blood and sealing the wound.
“I could give up air for that taste.”
His free hand tightened around my throat, just enough to make spots dance in my vision. He paused only to press his thumb against my clit, and I saw stars.
“Tell me, Estrella, do you still think I don’t want you?” Roman hissed.
I couldn’t answer; his grip around my throat was nearly suffocating. He tilted my head forward to ensure I was looking in the mirror, then smiled. His teeth were stained pink with my blood, and dark tendrils of power coiled over his skin like shadows. His eyes were pitch black,brimming with desire.
“You turn me into a savage, Estrella, and I don’t fucking care. No one will take you from me again because I’ll be your shadow for the rest of your life. If a man so much as looks at you too long, I’ll kill him, because you pull the monster out of me. That’s how much power you have over me.”
His words barely registered in my mind, overshadowed by the blackening vision closing in on me. He was relentless, his fingers razing me until nothing else mattered. I was climbing to the peak, ready to topple over the edge.
“And I know you love it. Look at how your body weeps for me, doll. You love your power, and I must be a masochist because I worship how you torture me,” he groaned.
I toppled into oblivion, my screams ragged against his merciless grip. I collapsed against him, pleasure raking through my body, pulling me to bliss and back again. His hand released my throat, allowing me to choke out desperate gasps for air.
“Such a good girl.” His arms wrapped around me, holding me with a tenderness that nearly brought me to tears. “Don’t ever question my desire for you again. I would set the world ablaze for you.”
The darkness of his words seeped calmness into me. He was right—as I looked in the mirror, my eyes glazed with contentment and my body flush with pleasure, I could nearly see it: my humanity, hidden beneath years of abuse. I would take what they had done to me and turn it into my weapon because there was no alternative. My eyes closed, and I curled into him.
“And I would gladly watch it burn.”
