I pretended not to notice.
I also stopped looking over the stone ledge. I glanced to my right instead, and saw a young witch, who must be either Fenrix or Liu, as the third in our party with Quicksilver. Liu, I guessed, watched Quicksilver expectantly, her expression alert.
Quicksilver’s voice grew a little less biting as he glanced around at the three of us.
“He’s not wrong, though, Miss Shadow,” he said. “The other flyers here all have some experience.” He gave the mage, Strangemore, an exasperated look. “But the point of this exercise is to show you two things. One, overthinking will generallynothelp you in most flying situations. Things happen too quickly in the air. Instinct, focus, and magic are the key here. You’re better off letting your magic act of its own accord, while paying attention to your environment and remaining calm. Incidentally, you’ll be trained in this mindset in Offensive and Defensive Magic, as well.
“Two,” he continued, holding up his index finger and thumb. “How youdouse your mind in the air still greatly matters. You don’t think about themechanicsof flying, but where you want to go, and what your intentions are. This is even more crucial in a combat situation, or a strategy game such as Skyhunt, but it’s also important for regular, transportation-style flying. Accidents are avoided when Magicals control their minds. If you’re thinking about how so-and-so-witch annoys you while in the air, or how you’re late for this or that class or meeting or whatever else, there’s a good chance you’ll crash into that particular witch, or fly faster than you can control, andyou’lllikely be the one injured.”
I swallowed.
Quicksilver’s eyebrow quirked higher, stretching one of his scars.
“You’ll be surprised by how amazingly sensitive wings can be,” he added. “The more control you have over your mind, thebetter flyer you’ll be. And the better you’ll be at controlling your magic, incidentally. Understand?”
Realizing he was aiming most of his words at me, I nodded.
“In theory,” I felt the need to add.
Quicksilver smiled wider. “Which is why you’ll be jumping off this platform,” he said. His eyes turned to Strangemore and Liu before returning to mine. “Theory won’t help you, Miss Shadow, not directly. Falling straight down will. And we’ll do it as many times as necessary to get you out of your head.”
Okay, now Ireallywasn’t reassured.
“Ready?”
No,I wanted to burst out.No, I bloody well am not!
I didn’t get the chance.
With no warning, a strangely light, but entirely unstoppable force began shoving me to the edge of The Eyrie’s top deck.
I let out a shriek, unable to help it…
…then I was over the edge and plunging straight down.
I couldn’t even scream.
Wind rushed into my lungs and face, blinding me, causing me to throw up my arms in pure instinct to shield my face and head. The wings followed my arms, and my view of the surrounding world vanished.
Cream and chocolate feathers surrounded me in warmth and fleeting comfort, until I remembered I was plummeting straight down, possibly to my death, whatever those jerks said, and from what had to be over thirty stories.
Even if they caught me before I hit the ground?
Get out of your head, get out of your head, get out of your head.
I closed my eyes.
Darkness enveloped me.
Somehow, the least helpful thing I could imagine invaded my mind?the dense, dark, cloying space of my nightmares, thesame nightmares I’d had since I was a kid. With it came the familiar crush of grief, of hopelessness, of wanting to die.
I knew the feelings too well. I used to wake up to them every morning.
I remembered being shaken awake in the middle of the night by my panicked brother, biting my tongue to stop my screaming, tasting blood as I fought the dark movies behind my eyes. Mum’s face, eyes filled with pain, her hand, reaching for me. I tried my damnedest to force the images away, even now, to send them back into that locked box before I started screaming again and couldn’t stop.
My aunt’s sharp voice cut into me.
“You were bellowing like a stuck banshee again.”Disgust rolled off her tongue.“Control yourself, girl. No one will show you pity, just because you’ve got a sad story. You’ll be beaten down, kicked, spat upon. Master your mind, or you’ll never be anything in this world…”
