“Oh, shut it. I’m hanging up now. Love you.”
“Hey.”
“What?”
Gina gets serious. “I love you too, big bro. Promise me you’ll be careful. I keep watching the news, and the fire is intense.”
This is one thing I hate about the job. How much worry it causes the people I care about? “Promise. I’m always as careful as I can be.”
We say our goodbyes and hang up. As I drive the rest of the way home in silence, I think about Larissa and how I’m kicking myself for not getting her number or asking if I could see her again. But then I remember she doesn’t live here. It’s best to separate now before it becomes impossible.
In a few days, she shouldn’t be overtaking my thoughts like she is now. It’ll fade.
SIX
LARISSA
FOUR DAYS LATER
Two nights ago,a massive rainstorm answered everyone’s prayers, hitting Black Timber Peak hard and extinguishing the wildfire. Although the fire did not destroy any mountain towns, it devastated thousands of acres, displacing and/or injuring countless wild animals. Numerous volunteers assisted with the animals and the cleanup. I’ve tried to be one of them, but my friends and the doctor put the kibosh on such physical activity since my lungs are recovering.
Besides Beth, the rest of us were supposed to leave yesterday, but the doctor doesn’t think that it is the best time for me to fly. Give it another week at least. My friends also changed their flight plans, and Beth even added a couple of extra days to her vacation, despite my telling them it wasn’t necessary. But their damn guilt is suffocating them, along with me.
I say nothing and let them ease their guilt, but I don’t blame them. I went along with it and, well, it brought me to Jace. How can I ever be sorry when I have that?
The man has been the center of my focus this whole time. I assumed not seeing him for a few days would ease this desire for him, but it hasn’t. It gets stronger, and I get more restless.
My friends worry, and I’m able to blame it on my discomfort and aching chest. Because my lungs and throat ache a lot. Who suspected smoke inhalation could be so painful?
Beth’s apartment is small, and we’re on top of each other here, which gets to be a bit much. But I’m the only cranky one who verbalizes it.
A fire siren blasts through the air, and I turn in my seat on the couch and lift the curtain, looking for Jace. It’s unreasonable, and I’m unsure why I do it, but I do. My friends notice, as they watch me like a hawk, and I’m a little embarrassed.
“Why don’t you visit him? He’s a firefighter, I’m sure we can find him at, oh, I don’t know, the fire station,” Beth says.
Hayley laughs. “Seriously? We’ll all go with you.”
That is the last thing I want. It’s bad enough that I embarrass myself with him on my own. No need to have an audience, too.
“It’s ridiculous. I don’t even live here, and it’s just a little crush. The man saved my life. Obviously, there’s a little hero worship going on here. Nothing more than that.” Damn, who knew I could lie so unconvincingly?
My friends do because all three roll their eyes.
“With everything you’ve gone through the past year, it’s not like you couldn’t move here,” Beth says.
I check her over to make sure she’s not having some sort of seizure or something.
“What? It’s not a crazy idea. You have nothing exciting to go back to. You hate your apartment, you hate your job, you hate being in the city.”
“I hate this mountain. It almost killed me. I’d love to get away.”
“Oh, to your four roommates and a literal coset for a bedroom. Oh, and what about running into Howard and his floozy,” Maddy says.
Her rough delivery forces me to wince, and she sighs. “I’m sorry, that was harsh.”
“You think?” Hayley says and reaches for my hand. “Larissa, you’re not happy there. You never even wanted to live in a big city like that. You wanted to find a small town, build your own freelance business, get married, and have babies. Now you’re stuck there with nobody. No support system. No family. No friends.”
The honesty hurts, but seriously, I’m going to uproot my life for a crush on a guy. It’s ridiculous and something I’m not up to doing. And I say so.
