‘I can but I’m not going to. I think you need to spend some time looking around as a family this weekend. I’ll come another time, I promise.’
He looked disappointed. ‘You really should come, Mum. Once you get familiar with the place you’ll want to move there. Cambridge is beautiful. And there’s lots to do, shops, entertainment, some lovely walks.’
‘I’m sure it is, but I don’t think this weekend is the right time. Don, you’re moving away. You’ll only see your wife and children every weekend from now on, until your house sells. You need tospend this weekend with just them. Stop worrying about me and concentrate on your family.’
‘You’re my family too, Mum. And I want you to live by us. You’ve got time to get an estate agent around before we go. They could value the house and get it on the market in a couple of days. You can move when we do, rent a little flat or stay with us for a while until your house sells. If you leave your keys with the estate agent, they’ll show people around.’
Goodness, he just wouldn’t listen to her.
‘I told you I’ve made plans for this weekend. And I need a bit longer to think about the move, love. Now stop worrying about me and concentrate on you, Laila and the children.’
Back at home, she walked around the house, going from room to room, savouring the memories. Becky’s former bedroom was the first room. This was the one Kali slept in when she and Rana stayed over. She and Brian had redecorated it when Kali was born, using a pale grey and pink scheme, so that it would still be suitable when Kali was older. There were pictures of animals all over the walls; Kali was mad about animals. The same colour scheme was used for the bed, the desk that doubled as a dressing table, the bookshelves and the wardrobes. Kali loved it. The next room was Don’s old room. This was similarly decorated but in grey and blue, with stars and planet pictures over the walls because Rana was fascinated by the night sky. If she moved to a bungalow in Cambridge, she would probably only have two bedrooms so the children wouldn’t be able to have one each.
They’re getting older, they probably won’t even want to stay over in a few years’ time, she realised.
The next room was now a study but this had once been Martin’s room. Dear Martin. She walked over to the tall cupboard in the corner and opened it. Shelf upon shelf of Martin’s things. His school books, his first roller skates, his skateboard. He hadbeen such a daredevil, never showed any fear. She glanced over at the framed quote on the wall over the desk, white words on a background of grey cobbled stones.
The inner fire is the most important thing mankind possesses.
—EDITH SODERGRAN
Martin’s favourite quote. He had that inner fire, that urge to do, explore, test his boundaries, right from an early age. He lived – and died – by it. What would he tell her to do? He’d probably tell her it was time she boxed up his things, she thought ruefully, remembering the big storage boxes she’d bought to do just that. Not yet though, she needed a little longer.
She walked all around the house, the memories comforting her. The king-size bed in her bedroom that, until that awful day last year, she and Brian had slept in side by side. The wardrobe that still contained his clothes. Then down into the kitchen where they had sat opposite each other, eating breakfast, her chatting away and Brian head deep in the daily newspaper, nodding and grunting occasionally. Sometimes that had irritated her, but now she would give anything to have him sitting there, reading the paper. Then the lounge where they sat watching TV. Brian loved documentaries, she loved dramas and watching the soaps, so they took it in turns to choose what programme to watch, the other one reading. It didn’t matter, they had still been together.
She walked out into the garden, the neatly mowed lawn – Don had arranged for a gardener to come in and do that now, although Sandra still tended to the flower beds, she found it relaxing – the shed where Brian kept all his gardening tools.Some men had a ‘man shed’ where they retreated for some peace and quiet but not Brian, he used the study for that.
Could she walk away from all this?
She sat down on the bench, her thoughts whirring around in her head.
It seemed like she had to choose between having her memories around her or having her family nearby.
18
PATTI
On Sunday morning, Patti scrolled through the Old Gals Insta page to see if their followers had increased and was pleased to see that they had. The video of Sandra finally learning to swim had gained a lot of likes and comments. She smiled as she played the video again. She was so pleased that she’d suggested they go to swimming lessons. That was another thing ticked off Sandra’s bucket list. Two things actually, she corrected herself, remembering that Sandra had also had her ears pierced. She had to get herself together and tick off another one from her list now.
A WhatsApp message pinged in from Kit.
Kit
Your Insta page is looking fab, Gran. I’ll have to show you how to do reels again, that’ll get you more attention.
Patti remembered her mentioning the reels when they’d first installed the app. ‘I might be able to manage it myself. I’ll have a try,’ she replied. ‘How are things with you?’
‘OK. I’ve decided not to move in with Seb. I think I should seea bit of the world and have a few adventures of my own before settling down.’
‘Good for you.’ Patti wrote back.
They messaged back and forth for a while then Kit said she had to go and would see Patti later in the week.
Patti made herself some toast and poured a glass of juice. She’d just finished them when Mary and Keith Facetimed. They were both sitting in the garden, drinking iced tea against a background of blue skies and fluffy white clouds. Patti couldn’t help feeling a bit envious. It was overcast and drizzly here in the UK.
They had a chat for a while, catching up on each other’s news, then Keith went to watch a programme on the TV, leaving Mary and Patti to talk.
‘What are you up to today?’ Mary asked.
