I nod. “Didn’t mean to crash that hard.”
He raises the green bottle like a toast. “You and half the house, it seems. I think everyone’s in recovery mode, getting ready for the week.”
A breeze moves through the trees on either side of the house and rustles the string lights overhead. A server is setting down a plate of olives at the table. Someone else is popping open another bottle of wine, this time followed by loud laughter. The conversation around us builds like a soft tide.
Connor nudges his chin toward the seats. “You hungry?”
“Starving.”
“Come on,” he says, tipping his head towards the table.
Elle is standing at the head, naturally, laughing with Hannah, one of her bridesmaids, and her boyfriend, Sterling, who also happens to work with Jack in whatever finance bro thing everyone on this trip does. They’re part of the tight inner circle, the kind of people I’ve seen at every dinner and weekend gathering since I joined this friend group, though I still mostly hover at the edges.
Right next to her, Jack is deep in conversation with Banks, another one of their college friends, something about rare watches and who still buys them.
“And then the dealer told him it was a 1997 prototype that only went to royal family members, so of course he bought it,” Banks says, not realizing how ridiculous it sounds.
“It was actually a good deal,” Cash, another of the bros, adds. “You can’t find those under six figures anymore.”
Connor snorts into his drink and walks to the other side of the terrace. I head towards my friend, and before I can even utter a word, she’s squealing and trampling me like she hasn’t seen me in a thousand lives. Never mind that she saw me just a few days ago at work.
“Oh my god, you’re here,” she says, squeezing my bicep and admiring me, head to toe. Almost like I’m a vision and she can’t quite believe I’m here. “I told Jackie you’d pull out at the last minute,” Elle says, still holding on to my arm. “With your immigration stuff and all.” She says it low, close to my ear, like it’s a secret, or maybe if she says it too loud, the gods will get angered and revoke myalmostpermanent resident status.
“I told you I was going to be here,” I say, with a smile on my face. I would never bail on her wedding, and it never even occurred to me to simply show up for the wedding and then go back to New York. She’s been talking about this trip for a year at least, and I want to celebrate with her. “It’s beautiful. All of this.”
She follows my gaze across the lake, then down the length of the table, like she’s seeing it all for the first time. “Jack’s parents wanted it to be… I don’t know. Special, I guess. A big send-off for both of us.”
“It’s definitely that,” I say.
She leans closer now, wrapping one arm around my neck, and lowers her voice. “Just wait until you see the boat party next week. Don’t pack anything you’re emotionally attached to. You will get wet.”
“Noted,” I say with a laugh, but there’s a hollow edge to it. I know she means well, but it’s easy for Elle to say things like that when a lot of her problems can be solved by money. Not saying that she throws money at them, but… I digress.
My friend flits away a moment later, called over by another girl from the group, Amelia, waving a bottle of wine, and I’m left standing alone, watching everyone settle into their seats. Laughter rises and falls like waves. People are already starting to shift into vacation mode—looser posture, louder voices, the kind of easy camaraderie that happens when no one is worrying about alarm clocks or deadlines.
Connor takes a seat at the other end of the table, deep in conversation with Banks, still going on about the watches, while his girlfriend Nicole scrolls on her phone. Connor’s listening, half-focused, holding a glass of something pale in his hand. When he looks up and catches my eye, he lifts his brows slightly, like we’re sharing an inside joke neither of us said out loud.
I look away before I smile too wide and find myself sitting next to him, drifting into his orbit like I’ve been doing all day. It’s almost like the universe is conspiring and has decided we are now buddies for this trip, given the coupled status of everyone around.
“You survived the bro corner,” I say under my breath.
“Can you actually believe that people hold entire conversations about watches?”
“I believe it. I mean, I once bought a sandwich that was forty dollars, and I still talk about it to this day.”
Connor laughs loudly, tipping his head back. His whole body shakes, and his eyes are shut so tight in amusement that the only thing I can do is stare in awe at this man who suddenly looks so different here, on vacation, than when we are back in New York.
Not that it should surprise me. I’ve watched him for years from a careful distance—at parties, group dinners, birthdays—always composed. Like there was an invisible line he never let himself cross.
But here… he’s loose. Untethered even on the first day of our group vacation. And I can’t stop looking.
“In my defense,” I add, and a chuckle escapes me, “it had really good pickles. Like, insanely good.”
His smile is crooked, and I stare at him some more, sipping from a drink that magically appeared in front of me while this whole thing was happening. The night is soft around us as the lake reflects the last light of dusk, and the hum of conversation rises again. Hannah toasts to the couple, and we all clink glasses together.
“For what it’s worth,” Connor says as he leans in slightly, his shoulder brushing mine—not enough to make a scene, just enough to remind me he’s still here, “I’m glad you came.”
I glance over, watching the profile of his face lit by string lights and ambient lighting, and for a second, I don’t know what to say.
