“Physical release is a powerful motivator to men, so expect him to want more of that. Just…know what it is.”
“And what it’s not,” I say glumly.
“Asha,” she cups my cheek, “I can see that your heart aches, but Ramsey isn’t worth your feelings. There are more men here than women, and I suspect you won’t have a problem finding a mate, if that’s what you want.”
“I hate the word mate.”
She shrugs. “It’s catchy.”
“Well, I highly doubt many of the Tempest men will want to mate with me.”
“I think you’re wrong. We’ve won many of them over, and they’re just now getting comfortable with the idea of courtship.”
While she’s not wrong, I doubt any of the men will look to me.
A whimsical giggle captures my attention, and I look over to see Araelya and Elric walking together.
“If only I were more like her,” I whisper. “Maybe then Ramsey wouldn’t be so hesitant.”
Elena gives me a soft smile. “I like you just the way you are.”
“No one else does.”
“May I be nosy?”
“Sure.”
“Do you even think Ramsey is capable of making you happy?”
“Does it even matter? We have to mate with these men regardless of our happiness.”
“Meg and I are both elated with our big blue men, and many others are, too.” She nods in Araelya’s direction. “Ramsey is rough around the edges, and more grumpy than anyone has a right to be. Maybe it would be best for you to get to know a few of the other men before resigning yourself to the worst of them.”
I hadn’t thought of it that way, and now I can’t help but wonder if there is truth in her concern.
Even if Ramsey does accept me as a mate, he would never dote on me the way Grixis does Elena, or adore me as Eddard does Meg. He’d tolerate me.
“I…I don’t know…”
“I’m just saying, before you commit to the village grump, take some time and think about what you want, and what would make you happy.”
No one in this village knows what they want better than me. It’s what I’ve wanted for over a decade, and has never once changed.
And that’s to be loved.
I’ve had it only briefly in my earliest years, when my mother still walked this earth.
And sadly, I don’t believe Ramsey is capable of making me feel that way.
“I suppose you’re right.”
“If you don’t mind, I need to make sure Amber isn’t causing a fuss.”
I return to Ramsey’s hut, mulling over the advice Elena gave me. Hating that I feel so lost.
It’s unfair to expect Ramsey to ever love me. That was never what this was about. And it’s not like I would have found love back in Penticar. My adoptive father would have eventually married me off to someone with no regard for my happiness, because there was never any love between us.
A knock sounds on the door. It’s Nori holding a basket overflowing with thread.
