Bedding Asha was a mistake. I knew that when I first tasted her in the cave, and yet I repeated the folly just last night.
Both times we were together, I never once thought of the princess, and even as I sit here now, thinking back to the recorded message, my loins do not stir.
They are dead to her.
Surely that is not true. The last few months have given us many surprises, and the moment I see the great princess, my desire will come surging back, like a tsunami.
But what will then happen to Asha and the other Penticari?
I should not care.
Yet, I do…
I exit the communications room, finding Jacek seated, watching data as it scrolls across a larger screen.
“Is there news?” he asks.
“No.”
He nods, his eyes flickering with curiosity.
Unwilling to share what was revealed, I exit The Tomb and continue to the smoker, where I find Orvell pulling a thick chunk of meat from one of the endergulfs I took down yesterday.
He sighs when he sees me, shaking his head.
“Is there something you would like to say to me?” I ask, more curious than angry.
“Just that I would not expect such weakness from you.” He grabs another piece of meat from the endergulf.
Wildfire spreads through my veins at his careless insult. I clench my hands into fists and pull in a sharp breath. “I would be careful where I speak of weakness, cleric.”
He glances askance at me, sneering as he pulls off another piece of meat. “You protect the weakest of them. One with no value that covers herself in spice nonsensically. Even annoying Kairi has some value in her, and will eventually be able to mend wounds and soothe bellies.”
I open my mouth to bark back at him, but what is there to say?
Asha weaves. Day in, day out, she sits, working threads into blankets and other things that have no real value among us.
I could repeat the line Grixis so often says, ‘strong in different ways,’ but in Asha’s case, it is a lie.
Why does that make my chest feel tight?
Especially when I am so close to getting back Princess Kasmina?
The truth is almost too much for me to bear.
Waking to Asha in my arms made me forget myself, and for a moment, I saw a future that shames me. One where I slept with my face nuzzled in her golden hair, our children favoring her light skin over mine.
She wore smiles for me, spent her days weaving, and her nights in my bed, mewling as she did when I tasted her flesh.
I dreamt of her in a way I never did the great princess, with such primal passion, I leaked seed all over my bedding.
Yet I know it is folly to have such thoughts, as Asha is not a worthy mate.
I storm away before coming to blows, stalking toward the outer edge of the village, where I find Krek.
Once a powerful warlord, he was chosen to train fledglings in the barracks, as his strategies were unparalleled.
Unfortunately, a miscalculation that occurred with a mission that could not have even been his fault led to his exile.
