His gaze softened, then his head fell back again and his eyes closed. So I stayed. Just like he asked. Still. Silent. Letting the quiet stretch between us like a weighted blanket.
After a minute, I slowly lowered myself against him, chest to chest, heartbeat to heartbeat. I nestled into the crook of his neck, and he let out a soft, content sound that could’ve been a moan, or a sigh, or both.
Then his arms slid around me, pulling me into a full body embrace that felt anything but casual. It felt intentional.
“This is so unnecessary,” I whispered, lips brushing the curve of his collarbone, teasing the rules he always clung to so tightly.
His chest shook with a quiet laugh, and his hand began trailing up and down my spine in a slow, soothing rhythm.
“No, Blue,” he murmured. “This is completely necessary.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
WEST
All the rules were broken.
Everything was out of control.
And somehow, I hadn’t felt this at peace in years.
When I first woke up and realized Blue had witnessed one of my nightmares, my instinct was to run. To get the hell away from her before she started looking at me with pity. Or worse, fear. I didn’t want to see either of those things in her eyes.
But then she climbed onto my lap. And just like that, the panic bled out of me. Her weight grounded me, pulling me back into the moment. Into her.
I’d spent my whole life keeping people at arm’s length, convincing myself it was safer that way. But with Blue, maybe it was easier to let my guard down because we both knew this was temporary. A deal. A contract. Something with an end date.
So why did it feel so real?
She was pressed against my chest now, her cheek resting in the crook of my neck, my hand stroking lazy circles down her back. I had a goddamn smile on my face, one I wouldn’t have believed possible ten minutes ago.
“This is so unnecessary,” she whispered.
“No, Blue,” I murmured. “This is completely necessary.”
I was exhausted. Bone-deep, soul-level tired. Whatever sleep I’d managed earlier wasn’t worth shit when my dreams were that haunted. But I wanted to sleep right here, with her stretched over me like a warm, breathing blanket.
Then her voice broke through the quiet again.
“West?” she asked, shyly.
My eyes flicked open. “Yeah?”
She hesitated. “Are we gonna break any of the other rules?”
That made me freeze. It wasn’t a tease. It wasn’t playful. It was a subtle way of reminding me that the intimacy we had already shared was stepping over the lines. Was there room for more?
Her eyes lifted to mine. “I know you said you don’t ever kiss anyone. But do you think there’s ever going to be a circumstance where you're going to have to kiss me?”
“It was a crazy rule, to think we could be around everyone and never kiss,” I said, and watched her eyes go wide in surprise. There was nothing penciled into my schedule when it came to Blue. No logic. No plan. Just a constant, chaotic current I couldn’t stop chasing. “But I don’t know when,” I added with a half-shrug.
“I’m not sure I’ll be able to handle the element of surprise.”
“I’m not sure our first kiss should be unrehearsed.” I tried to make it sound like banter, like I was keeping the aftermath of my nightmare at bay, but my voice cracked a little and she subtly reacted with wide eyes before nodding in agreement.
I could tell she was still trying to believe it was just a business arrangement. That a kiss between us right now was nothing more than part of our act. But after everything, I wasn’t so sure anymore. The lines were too blurry to even see straight.
“Are you okay?” She asked softly. “I need to know you’re feeling better”
