“I know we live in different cities and lead separate lives,” he rasps out. “And I see how hard you’ve worked to build yours, your career, your independence, everything. I would never want to take any of that away from you. What I’m asking is…is there space for me in that life? This ring doesn’t come with expectations or conditions. It’s just a symbol of something new. A fresh start. You and me, together.”
There are few times in my life when I’ve found myself at a loss for words.
But this is one of them.
Pushing off the bench, I fall forward into him, anchoring my arms around his neck. He holds me tight against his body.
I’d be lying if I said I didn’t need him, didn’t want him the same way he wanted me.
Life is really messy right now, and I have no idea what the future holds, what it will look like to keep this relationship going.
But there’s one thing my heart won’t let me lie about.
I nod, tears rolling down my face, the cold air biting my cheeks, and kiss him longingly, like it’s the first time all over again. Jesse pulls us up to our feet and holds me in his arms.
“What do you say?” he whispers, and I glance down at the bench with our initials still carved in it.
“Yes.”
There’s no need to find space for him to fit in—there’s been an empty gap in my life, in my heart, where Jesse was always meant to be. I just needed him to come home to realize that.
I stare at the green sea glass as he slips the ring on me.
It fits, like I never took it off.
45
Jesse
NOW
It looks like she’s leaving for an international three-month vacation. The foyer’s lined with overstuffed leather luggage, and every time I see it, something deep in me aches. I try to keep myself moving, busy, not thinking about the fact that in mere minutes, Penny’s going to drive away from this house.
This isn’t right, my heart screams, but this is how it was always going to be.
Penny has a life outside this bubble. Outside of me.
Two weeks ago, I wasn’t sure what it would be like to see her, I half expected her to treat me like I was already dead, and now I’m reeling with the idea of her absence.
There’s going to be a definite void of sunshine that only Penny Hanson can supply.
Fia’s misty eyed, too, so I decide to be the strong one here.
“I’m not sure how this all fit in your Barbie car to begin with, but let me help you.” I pick up two bags, and Penny tightens the belt around her long wool coat. My eyes catch on the ring.
She looks sophisticated and beautiful, like she’s about to jet off to London or Paris. Another reminder of the promise I made to her: I’d love her no matter where she was, and I’d never get in the way of the life she made.
“Thank you—just lodge that one in the back.” She points to the trunk, and I chuckle, but it rattles my chest.
Penny doesn’t meet my eyes as we walk back in for more bags, more polite words between us.
Words that just reach the surface when all I want is more depth, more time. I know our relationship will be different, not ideal. But it’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make for her.
I went ten years without so much as breathing the same air as Penny. I can go six weeks before she’s back for Fia’s baby shower.
“Got everything?” Fia asks, and Penny nods, wrapping her arms around her sister.
“Thanks again, for the crib…for trying to mend me,” Fia murmurs, and Penny sniffles but plasters on the biggest smile.
