‘Why?’ asked Olivia, frowning.
‘Because I don’t want to get involved with anyone.’
Olivia hesitated before swinging her legs round and putting her feet on the floor to face Kitty. ‘But why?’
‘Because,’ said Kitty, ‘the way I feel reminds me of when I met my husband, Ryan.’
‘Oh, wow,’ said Olivia. ‘You have got it bad for this guy, then?’
‘Well, I wouldn’t say that exactly . . . but I can’t face having to deal with any heartache.’
‘Hey,’ said Olivia gently. ‘This is just a drink between friends. You don’t have to marry the guy. Just think of it as a new adventure and a new friend. But, for what it’s worth, I think if you don’t go, Kitty, you’ll regret it.’
Kitty knew she was right.
‘Does he know about Ryan?’ Olivia asked, her face wincing in sympathy.
‘No. It’s not exactly one to throw into a casual chat, is it?’
‘I get that,’ said Olivia. ‘But it’s part of you and your life and your story.’
‘I know.’
‘What would you say if the roles were reversed, and I was asking you what to do?’
‘Oh, you are good at this, Olivia, I’ll give you that. I would say just go along and enjoy the moment. And be yourself.’
‘What else?’ said Olivia encouragingly.
‘It’s not a lifetime commitment. And I would also say, what have you got to lose?’
‘Case closed,’ said Olivia. ‘Now, what are you going to wear?’
* * *
A few hours later, Kitty decided to take the long route to the pub — along Fisherman’s Walk, which skirted the beach andthe sea. Despite Olivia’s suggestion to lend her several floaty dresses, she declined. She would have felt out of place in chiffon, and it was important to her that she was comfortable and felt like herself. That’s all she could be. She’d let her hair hang loose over her shoulders and decided on her faded grey jeans and green Converse trainers, a white sleeveless T-shirt and lots of chunky bracelets. Then she had applied a touch of lip gloss and sprayed herself lightly with perfume. She threw a light cardigan and a brolly into her bag, in case the weather changed later.
‘You look great,’ said Olivia, giving a low whistle. Olivia was wearing her pyjamas and had just taken a pizza from the oven. ‘Think you’re going to have a more exciting night than me,’ she said wryly.
Kitty was just glad that Olivia seemed a bit brighter and more like herself after the emotional outpouring earlier.
‘Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,’ called Olivia. ‘In fact, please just forget that I actually said that out loud. I’m not exactly one to be doling out relationship advice.’
Kitty had laughed and hugged her friend. ‘Thank you. I’ll see you later.’
Now, as she made her way along the boardwalk, she inhaled the coconut scent from the yellow gorse bushes and watched the ducks bobbing about in the water, keeping their distance from a couple of huge swans that were elegantly gliding through the sea. The water was still tonight, and there were a couple of paddleboarders out making the most of the flat conditions.
Although she was nervous, she realised she was also excited about seeing Logan. She just hoped that things wouldn’t be too weird when they met. It wasn’t the first date she’d had since Ryan, there had been a few disastrous meetings since then, and the memories made her shudder. They had completely put her off dating. Focusing on bringing up Cameron had been her priority. This somehow felt different. It was something that shewas looking forward to. She just hoped they would slip into their easy banter when they met, and things wouldn’t be awkward because they were ona kind of date, if that’s what this even was. Think of it as a drink between friends, she reminded herself. As she followed the path onto the sand, she spotted the red funnel of the ferry, which was leaving the port to return to Ardrossan. She shook her head when she thought just how much had happened since she arrived here.
When she started to near the pub, her breath quickened and the fluttering in her stomach intensified. She could hear Olivia asking her what she would tell a friend in this situation. ‘I would tell her to breathe and be herself,’ she said aloud, glad that nobody was around now that she was talking to herself. Didn’t that used to be the first sign of madness? She walked into the beer garden, her eyes darting around. She immediately saw Logan, who had just sat down at a wooden table. He lifted a hand in greeting and smiled warmly at her.
‘Hey, Kitty,’ he said. ‘How are you?’ He stood up and reached to give her a hug.
He wore a pair of dark jeans and a grey T-shirt, and his sunglasses were perched on top of his head. She could smell his familiar scent of soap and spice. ‘Can I get you a drink?’ she offered.
‘Let me get this one,’ he said. ‘What would you like?’
‘A gin and tonic, please.’ It was her safe drink, whereas wine tended to make her overshare, especially when she was nervous.
