He sits up and watches our combined juices pour from me. I watch him collect them with his fingers and push them back into me.
I just stare, confused and mesmerized.
Until a harsh reality shocks me.
“I’m clean, obviously. But I’m also on the pill, to regulate my hormones, so there’s no risk here,” I assure him, not wanting him to worry about a pregnancy.
He freezes, mid-collection. His brows furrow, his lips turn down, and his shoulders hunch. I can’t make sense of this change of behavior.
Before I can dwell on it, he looks at me softly. “I’m clean too. I’ve never gone bare before. Only with you.”
He puts on his pants and walks to the bathroom. He comes back with a wet cloth and cleans me. Then he lays me in bed and pulls me to him.
I fall asleep in his arms, and I know there’s no going back.
And I don’t want to.
Chapter 39
Cecilia
It’s been weeks of this heaven. The days pass in a blur of pure happiness. Every day has been a great day. Nothing’s been able to dampen my mood.
Because of him.
Because of my hero.
He’s perfect. Life with him is perfect. We either see each other or call every day. He makes me a priority. Some days he walks me home from work, and I cook dinner for him and Gracie. Others we’ll go to the park or out to eat.
On weekends, he’ll take me to different spots around town, and show me around. It’s been surreal.
Even when we’re just hanging out at the apartment, it’s great. It’s him. Roman is my dream man. There’s never been someone more perfect for me. The universe is truly rewarding me.
I’m envisioning our future, and it’s one I want so badly.
And I’m starting to think it’s less of a dream and more of a promise.
Chapter 40
Roman
I haven’t ever smiled this much in my life. It’s my sunshine, she makes me happy. She brings me so much joy. She brightens my life.
The past few weeks have been perfect. I can tell she feels the same way. She just doesn’t realize they’ve been so great because I’ve carefully cultivated them to be so.
I’m her dream man. Sweet, caring, gentle, kind… It’s not all a farce; I do enjoy being those things around her. She brings them out in me. But it’s not all honest either. I’ve kept many things hidden, including my threatening nature and stone-cold killer instincts.
Hell, even the sex has been soft. We’ve been making love. Which isn’t bad at all. I love her, and I love making love to her. It’s just different than the hard and rough way I’ve always fucked. But I can’t take her that way because I won’t risk scaring her. She’s so kind and fragile, I can’t tarnish her.
She doesn’t suspect anything. She’s as naïve as ever. My sunshine has the awareness of a rock, whichdespite helping me keep her, concerns me. I’ve reserved every morning and every afternoon to following her to and from work, even if it’s out of my way. I just have to make sure she’s safe. She doesn’t suspect a thing, which again, is concerning.
Anyway, she can keep being oblivious and optimistic. I’ll keep her out of harm’s way. She’ll never be hurt again. She’ll never be alone again.
Just as I never will.
We’ll be by each other’s sides for the rest of our lives.
No matter what it takes.
