Made it down the steps.
Made it to the truck.
But the second the door closed behind me, I broke.
I dropped my head against the steering wheel, fists clenched in my lap, and let the tears come hot and fast. No one to see. No one to hear. Just me and the tight, aching weight of doing everything I could, and still feeling like it was never quite enough.
Pull yourself together, man. Have to be strong for that little girl who’s depending on you.
I sucked in a deep breath and scrubbed my face with the hem of my T-shirt like a damn kid. No one needed to see me like that. I’d be damned before I let Matty gloat over my red eyes.
It took a few minutes, but eventually I felt composed enough to turn on the ignition and drive out of Estelle’s driveway. At least I didn’t hear any screams coming from inside her house. My little bug would be fine. I wished Ididn’t have to leave her the day after her mother had abandoned her, but it couldn’t be helped. Bills still had to be paid. The world didn’t stand still because your wife upped and left you.
Fuck.
I caught a glimpse of my face in the rearview mirror. My eyes looked red. I gripped the steering wheel tighter. At the thought of running into Matty, the pit in my stomach churned into something bitter. I wasn’t ready for him today. Hell, I wasn’t sure I ever was.
If he were anyone else, I would have already squared up and fought his ass to leave me the hell alone, but I couldn’t lay hands on him. Not Matty. I could never physically hurt him. Not after everything I’d already done to him.
Fifteen minutes later, I pulled into the Bristle M and let out a breath when Gray Magnuson, the owner of the ranch and Matty’s dad, walked toward the barn. Relief and nerves tangled in my gut. I respected the hell out of Gray—had since the day he hired me—but I’d never been sure what he really thought of me.
Surely, he knew about me and Matty. I’d expected him to fire my ass when we broke up, but he’d said nothing, so maybe he wasn’t sure what went down between us.
Matty had wanted us to be discreet. Late nights. Locked doors. Whispers and shadows. But nothing stayed hidden long on a ranch like this, nor in a town this small. Word had a way of getting around, especially when it was about the wealthy ranch owner’s son and you weren’t fit to lick his boots but tried anyway.
I parked my truck and grabbed the hat from the passenger’s seat. Gray had reemerged from the barn, moving toward his pickup. Jamming my hat on my head, I walked over, heart thudding heavier than it should’ve been. Theranch needed reliable people, and with being solely responsible for Ivy, I couldn’t promise to be at work when I should.
“Morning, Hudson,” Gray greeted with a nod, eyes sharp but not unkind. “Everything all right?”
I stopped a few feet away and removed my hat, swiping nonexistent sweat from my brow. I was nervous. He already gave me Thursdays off to take Ivy into the city for her speech therapy.
“Not exactly, I’m afraid.” I crushed my hat in my fist. “I need to talk to you about something personal.”
He leaned against the truck. “Sure, what’s up?”
“It’s about my little girl Ivy.” I scratched the back of my head and looked beyond his shoulder, not wanting to see the pity in his eyes. “My wife—well—she packed up and left us yesterday.”
“Jesus. I’m sorry to hear that.”
A sharp laugh echoed out of me. “Everyone knew it would happen someday. She stayed longer than I thought she would.”
“Doesn’t make it any easier. Is there anything I can do?”
A lump formed in my throat. I’d lucked out having him as my boss. He offered before I even asked.
“I’m going to need to take a few days off, starting tomorrow, to figure out arrangements for Ivy.”
“Of course,” he said without missing a beat. “Take all the time you need. But why don’t you drop Ivy off here? I’ll ask, but I’m sure Gertie wouldn’t mind keeping an eye on her for you.”
As tempting as the offer was, I couldn’t do that to her. “Gertie has her hands full taking care of the meals. Wouldn’t feel right putting that kind of responsibility on her.”
“Well, the offer is there if you don’t find anothersolution, and don’t worry about me docking your pay. You help your little girl to adjust as best as possible.”
My eyes stung at the kindness he showed me. Surely, he couldn’t know about my relationship with Matty. There was no way he would have been this nice to me.
“Thanks.” I blinked several times, forcing back the tears. “I appreciate it. With it being just me, I’ll need every dollar I can earn. I don’t want her to lack anything.”
“I get it.” Gray nodded, a wistful expression on his face. “Listen, Clayton and I were supposed to work on the fencing along the north pasture, but he ain’t here yet. Why don’t you join me? We’ll get the job done faster with the two of us. I need an early day today.”