I lifted my head, chest heaving against his thigh. “Isn’t that the point? To make us both come?”
“Not this way.” He tugged me up by the hair until his mouth met mine again. Matty kissed me hard, then pulled back, eyes burning with something I hadn’t seen before, something almost shy, almost tender. “I want to bottom for you.”
My brain stuttered. “What?”
“You heard me.” His voice dropped low, like a secret he’d been saving. “I want you to fuck me, Hud.”
Shock punched through me. My whole time with Matty, he’d been a top, firm about it, confident in it. My breath stalled in my chest. “But you only top.”
His smile curved, soft and steady. “Yeah, but for you? I’m willing. Why should you have to bottom all the time because I say so? We can compromise.”
Heat and disbelief warred in me. I searched his face for hesitation, for doubt, but all I found was certainty. Still, I had to ask. “Are you sure? What brought this on? Fuck, is that why you ignored the wings while I was busy stuffing them down?”
“Maybe.” He kissed me again, slow, deep, grounding me in it. “If I don’t like it, we stop. Simple as that, but I’m willing to try with you.”
My heart slammed against my ribs, so hard I swore he could feel it. The idea of being inside him—of Matty letting me—was almost too much. I hadn’t allowed myself to think about it, since I knew he was a strict top. He never hid it, and I had accepted my role as his bottom.
Cradling his face, I pressed my lips to his. How could I give up the chance to be inside him? To find out what it was like? Would it be more different from the hollow I’d felt with the men in my past?
“I’ll try to make it good for you, Matt.” I smiled against his lips. “Not too good, though. Still want you topping me most nights. Feels too good to give that up.”
His laugh cracked the tension, the sound spilling into my mouth as he kissed me again. “Lube’s in the drawer next to the bed.”
“Can’t believe you planned this whole thing.” I kissed his shoulder and grabbed the bottle of lube. My hands were shaking. “Are you sure, Matty?” I had to ask again.
He took the lube from me and my other hand in his. He squeezed a cool line onto my fingers, then lay back, spreading wide for me like he’d already decided. “Like this. I want to see you.” His voice was low, rough with want but steady.
My chest tightened. The weight of what he was giving me was almost too much. I didn’t want him to hate the experience.
I shifted between his legs, knees pressing into the mattress, and bent down to kiss him first because I needed that connection before anything else. He opened his lips to mine, tongues sliding together, and when my slick fingers found the warm crease of him, he shivered but didn’t pull back.
I rubbed gently first, circling, teasing, until he sighed against my mouth. “Hud…”
“I’ve got you,” I whispered, kissing his cheek, his jaw, the hollow of his throat, and eased one finger in. His hand clenched in the sheets, knuckles white, but he opened his thighs wider. “How’s that?”
“Feels different,” he said shakily. “But… not bad. Not with you. Keep going.”
I kissed down his chest, licked his nipples, and he gasped. So I bit down gently on the nub while working my finger slowly, stroking in and out, shallow, letting him adjust. His hips twitched; his breath caught. When I added a second finger, he groaned into my mouth and gripped my hair hard.
“Fuck, Hud. You’re being careful. Too careful. I don’t need you to go that slow.”
I chuckled softly. “Would you rather I just ram my cock in? I want to make it good for you.”
“Just not too good.” His strained laugh wrapped around me.
“Bingo.”
I scissored my fingers, working him open, kissing him through every hiss, every groan. When I brushed that spot inside him, he gasped and arched up, eyes flying wide.
“There?” I murmured, kissing the corner of his mouth.
“Yeah. Fuck, yeah.” His cock twitched against his stomach, leaking.
I slid a third finger in, stretching him. Sweat beaded on my forehead with the effort of holding back. Matty kissed me through it, deep and hungry, like he wanted to devour me whole, and hooked his legs around my waist, pulling me closer.
“I’m ready,” he whispered against my lips. “Hudson, please. Do it.”
My throat closed up at the sound of my name in that tone, like a prayer, like trust. I slicked myself fast, lined up, and paused, my forehead pressed to his.
