But I’m already engaged, so why did I feel a moment of happiness when Gray asked me too?
“We’ve really been away for too long, Oz,” he said. “Let’s get our things together and head out.”
Reluctantly, I gave him his shirt. Gray hopped from the truck to finish buttoning up himself. I grabbed my clothes and followed his lead, feeling his eyes on me, watching my every move. When I shuffled to the edge of the truck, he put my boots on for me and helped me down, but he didn’t let me go. Gray pulled me into his body and wrapped his arms around me.
He sighed and dropped his arms. What was going through his mind? Would he tell me if I asked?
“Sit in the truck. I’ll pack all this up.”
“I should help, since I contributed to the mess.”
“I can handle it.”
“But—”
“Oz. Let me handle it.”
In other words, he wanted to be alone. Swallowing, I walked to the front of the truck and climbed in the passenger seat. The twine ring sat heavily on my finger. I turned it around and around, studying it in the pale moonlight. It was simple andrough, yet more meaningful than anything I’d ever received. Even my expensive engagement ring.
Oh god, I hate the hideous thing Carter had bought me. The diamond was too big, and it overshadowed the band. Why was I only admitting it to myself now?
Gray had a way of forcing me to face the truth.
I stared out the window at the moon when Gray slipped into the driver’s seat. We both smelled of sex and sweat. As we drove back to the ranch, he kept the window down. Had the scent bothered him?
As we traversed the barren land in the dark, it was easy to think we were the only two people in the world. The closer we got to the ranch, the more my leg bounced and my chest tightened. Why did we have to go back? Why couldn’t we run away somewhere no one knew us? We could pretend he didn’t have a son, and I didn’t have a fiancé. But pretense was what led us here in the first place. What good was pretending?
I inched my hand over and placed it on Gray’s thigh.Please reject my touch.If he did, I would have no reason to cling to him. Everything that had happened on the overhang would be in the past. An illusion even. We could pretend it never happened.
Seconds ticked into minutes. My heart bled, and tears burned my eyes. He wasn’t rejecting me, but he wasn’t exactly encouraging either. I removed my hand, but Gray grabbed it and returned it to his thigh. He kept it there with his on top of mine. I stared at his profile, but he didn’t turn his head once. He didn’t need to. His hand on me told me everything I needed to know.
He was no more ready for this to end than I was.
18
GRAY
Just as I was about to leave the room, my phone rang. I’d been so scatterbrained all evening at my impending date with Ozzie I’d almost headed out without my phone, keys, and wallet.
No, not a date. You promised to bring him to watch the local theater production, is all.
But it was kind of like a date, since I was picking him up, taking him, and bringing him back home. If I was lucky, there might even be some kisses. I wasn’t holding my breath. He’d wanted to pretend for one night. We hadn’t gotten a chance to hang out again since we arrived home to spectators. I’d hoped no one would know how late we got in, but Matty and Hudson had been in a heated argument in the yard when we pulled up.
At least Ozzie ran inside before Matty came over, a suspicious gleam in his eyes. Had he seen Ozzie’s fair skin bruised from my hands and kisses, he wouldn’t have been so easily fooled that Ozzie and I had driven to the next town over for dinner after the movies. Ozzie had conveniently not been feeling well yesterday, and I’d only glimpsed him this morning. I’d fought my instinctsall day to return to the house early just to see him. Matty was smart and would figure shit out soon if I kept leaving work early.
I picked up the phone and almost dropped it. Carter. Why was he calling? Of all the years I’d prayed for him to call, why then? He never called me. The most I got from him was a voice note, and those were rare.
Had Ozzie told him the wedding was off? He did plan to call it off after what we’d done, didn’t he?
An icy knot formed in the pit of my stomach. I took a deep breath and swiped the screen. “Hey, Carter.” I tried to keep my voice light and steady, a near-impossible feat, given the tightness in my chest.
“Hey, Dad, I’ve been calling Ozzie for the past two days, but he’s not answering. Does he seem upset to you?”
“I don’t think so. Why?”
“It’s just that…”
“What is it, Carter?”
