“Weird thing for a hockey player to lie about, so I assume he’s actually gay, yes.”
“So what we know,” Vanessa said, “is that he liked you enough to go to your recital when you were both teenagers, he remembered you after thirteen years, he went to your show last night, he carried your gear home, and he’s totally gay.”
“Right.”
“That,” Marcus said, “is fucking romantic.”
“That,” Fabian corrected him, “is not anything.”
“It’s the best, right?” Vanessa said gleefully. “Like, this is the most interesting thing ever. I am fully invested in this.”
“Completely,” Tarek agreed.
“There is nothing to be invested in,” Fabian said wearily. “I’ll probably never see him again. We exchanged numbers, but you know how that goes.”
“You exchanged numbers!” Vanessa said in a voice so high it was almost inaudible.
“So, new plan,” Marcus said, clapping his hands together. “Fabian breaks up with Claude, and then he marries the gay hockey player and they have big, dumb babies together.”
“You’re an idiot. And Claude and I arenottogether.”
“Your mouths were together last week,” Tarek pointed out.
Fabian closed his eyes, drawing strength from the universe. “It’s not happening again. It was a mistake. I’m done with him.”
“Sure,” Tarek said.
“Totally,” Marcus said, nodding.
“Whatever. I hate you guys.”
“Does that mean you are going to make out with us?” Vanessa asked. “Because it seems like—” Her sentence was cut off when Fabian tossed a cat-shaped pillow at her.
“Who wants more coffee?” he asked. He needed a break from the room after that conversation. Everyone raised their hands, so he busied himself in the kitchenette for the next few minutes.
“Next order of business,” Vanessa announced, when Fabian returned with a French press full of coffee, “is Tarek’s birthday.”
Tarek let out a long groan. “If you don’t mention it, it might not happen!”
“Sorry, babe. You’re turning thirty. Deal with it.” She shoveled two heaping spoonfuls of sugar into her coffee.
“So, obviously we’re going out,” Marcus said. “May I request that we go anywhere other than—”
“Force! Force! Force!” Vanessa started chanting. Tarek joined in, followed by Fabian.
“Fuck you guys,” Marcus grumbled. “Fine. It’s in three weeks, right? I’ll make sure I’m not working, at least.”
“Remember when you were a stripper?” Vanessa said. “And we’d visit you at work? That was the best.”
“That was theworst, actually,” Marcus corrected her. “But I do miss that gig sometimes. Stupid fire.”
“Stupid arson, you mean,” Tarek said.
“Yeah. It was a good club.”
“It totally was,” Vanessa agreed. “Remember that time you fell down?”
“I didnotfall down! Istumbled. And recovered. And you are awful.”
