Is he thinking, I made a mistake?
Worry covers his handsome features. My fingers run along the glittering scar that slices up his jaw and kisses his cheek.
Does he know this is the most alive I’ve ever felt? Does he know how badly I wish I’d tried harder in the past? Does he know how fast my heart’s pounding just for him?
My throat feels tight, and I can’t form the words to speak.
I lean into him and he mirrors my actions. My lips brush gently over his, and he kisses me with delicate care.
Neither of us speak the confusing words that seem to disappear the moment our mouths touch. We ignore the emotions we can’t understand.
Because the way I feel right now with his body against mine makes complete sense.
He kisses me for so long, his hips begin to thrust slowly against mine once more. It’s like he’s starting all over again.
Maybe he was wrong.
Maybe we do have forever.
* * *
A rope never comes. Carver’s scared face never appears. Eventually, we’re forced to leave my father’s office, fearing that they may come looking for me at any moment. I set to tidy up the room and wipe away what I can of mud from Nollix’s shoes. He grimaces as he straightens some papers and dirt smears across the page.
“So sorry.” He scowls.
“It’s a day for firsts, it would seem.” I set the clear glass silhouette of a wolf, used as a paperweight, upright again. “Mark this day on the calendar.” With a simple smile, I arch my hands above my head as if readying the headline of the city’s news. “Nollix Forester apologizes to Violence Starling for the first time ever.”
“Smartass.” Then, in true Nollix style, he gives me his favorite vulgar gesture. I return it with a wink.
I turn, meaning to show him the way back to my room... Funny, I’ve never taken a boy to my bedroom before. Well, I’m assuming the times I thought Nollix was a damn hallucination don’t count. My hip manages to catch the edge of the desk, and a stack that had just been righted topples right to the floor.
Hair falls into my face as I sag with a groan. Nervous adrenaline starts to spike in my stomach. The longer we are here, the greater the chance they’ll find us. I drop to my knees, gathering papers before my entire body freezes at the glimpse of a leather cover shoved under several other books.
“Vi?” Nollix questions, crouching down to my level.
Everything I’ve gathered in my hands gets roughly shoved into Nollix’s grasp. He blinks and takes the papers without a word as I crawl forward to the bottom of one of my father’s bookshelves. The book is heavier than I remember. I grunt as I take its full weight and spin it to show Nollix the cover.
He cocks his head. “The Book of Severed Souls?”
“The one and only,” I whisper. “Let’s get out of here.”
He nods, sending one more final glance at the ceiling, and sets the stack back on the desk. He’s at my back, carefully turning off the light and closing the door behind us. Suddenly, I feel like a teenager sneaking through these halls. The Book of Severed Souls is clutched tightly against my chest with one arm and with the other, I hold tightly to Nollix’s hand. The only difference between this and being a teen and trying to sneak Trill somewhere he shouldn’t be is that this has much higher stakes.
By some blessing from the goddess herself, we make it back to my room. I’ll have to make a trip back to the king’s office at some point to make sure there isn’t a random rope hanging from the ceiling.
I drop the book against my bed, instantly flipping through its pages while Nollix hovers at my back. Some of the passages I scan are familiar from the way that I’ve heard Basilus and Jeriko talking about them. Some of them I can even remember from glances into the stupid notebooks they’ve been scribbling in.
“Looking for something in particular?” Nollix finally settles on the bed.
“The Darkest Deed is what we’ll need.”
“TheDarkest Deed?” Nollix leans against the wall, his gaze shifting from me to the dangerous book. “That doesn’t sound... pleasant.”
It most definitely is not.
“The idea is that King Melic is using these souls somehow,” I tell him. “I think he’s feeding off of them.” There’s a vacant tone in my voice as I think about how ominous those words are. His immortality is coming from somewhere. I just know it’s the souls. These people lost their lives, and now my father’s taking their souls.
“Why would he feed off of them?” Dark brows lie low over Nollix’s pretty eyes.
