It was her, probably. Maybe he was mad that she wouldn’t give him an answer yet, or maybe he was already thinking about leaving on tour. But being this close to him broke her open in a way she’d never experienced, and she couldn’tnotask.
Because as beautiful, as heart-stoppingly perfect as the sex had been…he was holding back. He’d been too open from the beginning for her not to notice.
He lifted her off his lap and onto the bed beside him. His expression was serious.
“I wasn’t sure if I should say anything…” he began, and she held her breath.
“Just tell me.”I can take it. Maybe.
“Will you come to New York to spend Christmas with me and my family?”
Her stomach lurched. That wasnotwhat she’d expected him to say. “What?”
He shifted, turning to look her full in the face. The position drew her attention down his magnificent body that seemed to know exactly how to move with hers. “What?” she said again.
His grin lacked some of its usual brightness. “When my mom called earlier, I told her about you. Asked if I could bring you with me.”
“Wait, you told yourmomabout me?” Already? Damn, this was going fast. Too fast. But curiosity briefly outweighed terror. “What did she say?”
He gave a light laugh. “She’s thrilled, of course. Can’t wait to meet you.”
Swallowing hard, Jess pushed herself off the mattress and stood. God, her thighs were still wobbly with aftershocks from the very thorough orgasm he’d just given her. “Hang on, I need to clean up.”
Even as she ran for the bathroom, she called herself a coward. This was twice now she’d gone to hide after he’d pressed her about the future beyond this third date, and he was too observant not to notice.
But this had gone so far outside the play zone, she had no idea what to do. Feelings were involved, and physical intimacy. Now he wanted to bring family into it? They were only on their third damn date!
And besides, what was the point? This would all be over soon.
In the bathroom mirror, her eyes were wide and scared. She had to calm down, and the only way that would happen would be if she pumped the brakes to stop them from speeding into unknown territory.
Why would he ask her to meet his parents? Family shit was never part of the bargain. She didn’t even go see her own family in Chicago for the holidays, so it didn’t make any kind of sense for her to fly all the way to New York City to see his. It was ridiculous.
She’d originally agreed to these dates as a temporary thing, never expecting it to go this far. And now that she knew he had a tour coming up, all her fears were confirmed. Three dates, and then, at some point, he would be leaving.Thanks for the memories, see you never.
None of it made sense. But she was too heartbroken to sort it out.
After cleaning herself up and wrapping her body in a towel, she took a deep breath, calling on every ounce of sarcasm and confidence she possessed. Then she swung out of the bathroom to break his heart.
“Thanks for the invitation,” she said, keeping her tone light and breezy, like he’d asked her to go to the library and notmeet his parents. “But it would be kind of silly for me to visit your family when I don’t even visit my own, you know?”
He sat on the bed in his boxers, his expression utterly blank. The perpetual warmth in his eyes had disappeared.
“Especially since I don’t even like Christmas,” she added with a forced laugh.
As she said the words, they tasted like a lie in her mouth. After all the work he’d put into showing her a good time this month, she was starting to love all this Christmas stuff. But the memories would always be tied up with him, and what hadn’t been.
More painful holiday memories to add to the collection.
Nik stood and nodded once like he agreed, but his eyes had shuttered and all traces of his easy smile had disappeared. “The roads are probably clear by now,” he said, his voice flat. “I’m going outside to clean off the car.”
He grabbed his clothes and walked past her into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him with a quiet click.
The hollowness spreading inside her said she’d made a very big mistake. She just didn’t know which part of it had done the most damage.
* * *
The driveback to Los Angeles was made in near silence, aside from Jess’s music playlist, a mix of classic jazz and recent hip hop. Nik wanted to ask her about it, but really, what was the point?
