And then I was alone.
I woketo the sound of wheels squeaking past my door and the faint chatter of nurses somewhere down the hall. The monitor standing beside my bed hummed quietly, the IV bag now half-empty. My mouth still tasted faintly metallic, but the ache in my muscles had dulled to something manageable. I blinked at the pale ceiling, piecing together where I was.
County hospital. 2004.No Torin.
The thought landed like a stone in my chest.
I blinked back tears looking around the room — to the sunlight filtering through the blinds, the smell of disinfectant, the cool weight of the hospital gown on my shoulders. Was there anything better than clean sheets, a laundered gown?
A scrubbed world, perfect and modern — it all sucked.
It all made my heart want to break.
I hated it.
I wanted to go back to live with Torin — even though the past had tried to kill me, even though the food sucked, the midges were terrible, and there was no plumbing. I wanted him.
A nurse came in, checked my vitals, and with an overly cheery smile said, “Your fever’s breaking. The doctor says if you can keep some fluids down and walk without help, you might go home this afternoon.”
I sighed.Home.
A house without Torin in it.
By the timethey wheeled me outside, the world felt too bright.
Jen was waiting, standing at the curb, holding the door of Cooper’s truck. “Front or back?”
“Back.”
I climbed in and they drove me home.
We pulledinto the driveway and my eyes settled on a horse, eating grass in my side yard.
For a split second I thought, ‘Torin!’
But then I realized what it meant.Oh.“Is that… that’s Ferrari.”
Cooper turned around in the seat. “Yeah, he left a horse, we gotta figure out what to do with the horse.”
Jen got out of the truck and opened my door. “Let me help you up the?—”
“No, I need to see Ferrari.”
I climbed down from the truck and slowly walked over to the horse. He was calm, ears flicking forward at the sight of me. My breath caught. “Hey, Ferrari.” The horse looked exactly as he had on the road beside Lambo, head high and watchful.
I stepped forward, still unsteady, and laid my hand against his neck. The horse leaned into my touch, warm and solid. I started to cry. “Do you miss Lambo? We got left behind, boy, sorry about that. Guess you’re stuck with me now.” I looked around at the space, tears streaming down.
“I’ll build you a stable here, would that be good? Not sure about the permits, but… I can do it.”
I felt really weak, this was the most I had done in days, just having a conversation with a horse. I turned and saw Coop and Jen waiting for me on the porch. I said goodbye to Ferrari andslowly walked over, wiping my face on my sleeve. Dude walked up, trilling like a monster-bird.
I used the porch railing to pull myself up the steps, saying, “Hey, Dude, you made it back, I’m so glad. You did just what you’re supposed to do, pay attention, be close when the time came to jump. Well done.”
Jen and Cooper fell in beside me, helping me up, holding the door, getting me inside. “Want your bed or the couch down here?”
“I think I want the couch. Not entirely sure I won’t throw up again, want to not do it in my bed. Plus it’ll be easier to order you around.”
Jen said, “Perfect,” and rushed around getting blankets and pillows and making me a nest on the couch.
