“You’re right. I had just sort of assumed that it was all about me—his being weird, I mean. Maybe it isn’t. A friend of his killed herself a few days ago.”
Andrew whistled. “A former girlfriend?”
“I don’t know. Maybe. Probably.” She shifted uneasily. “Maybe I’m fooling myself, but I don’t think he’s lost the love of his life, yet there’s something going on. It’s hard to explain.”
“Suicide is difficult for those left behind,” Andrew said. “Your friend is probably feeling a lot of conflicted emotions. Being in a new relationship is only going to add to his confusion and guilt. Try not to take it personally.” He shook his head. “Unless all this is too much work and you’d rather pass. You don’t have to get involved with this guy, Darcy.”
“It’s not that.” She didn’t think Mark was too much trouble. “I guess so much has happened so fast that I’m having trouble keeping my equilibrium.” She tried to smile and had a feeling she didn’t do a good job. “I’m so used to guys taking off the second they find out about Dirk. All this stuff with Mark isn’t about that.”
“It’s tough to find out we’re not the center of the universe,” he teased, then sobered. “Are you okay, Darcy? You’re dealing with a lot right now.”
“I’m fine.” At least she was trying to maintain some semblance of normal. Mark didn’t make it easy.
Andrew leaned toward her. “Do you want to talk about Dirk’s impact on your social life?”
“I’m not sure there’s anything to say. It’s not a new story. I love my brother and I would do anything for him. One of the realities of the situation is that people—men especially—don’t want to get involved if it’s not going to be easy. Dirk isn’t easy. There are emotional and financial commitments that will last a lifetime. At least if a woman has kids, the assumption is that the kids are going to grow up and be on their own eventually. That may not happen with Dirk.”
“I think it’s a very good possibility with your brother,” Andrew told her, “but it’s not a sure thing. As for the men you’ve met, I’m sorry they’ve all been so shallow. There are a few good ones out there and I suggest you keep on looking.”
“Oh, I haven’t given up. I just have gotten more cautious.”
And foolish, she thought, as she remembered Mark. When he’d agreed to her request to be friends, she’d allowed herself to hope things might be different with him. Ironic that she couldn’t blame his disappearance on Dirk.
“Keep looking, Darcy,” Andrew said. “You’re a wonderful woman. Any man would be lucky to have you in his life.”
“Right. When you meet this paragon of virtue, be sure to give him my number, okay?”
“I promise.”
Darcy rose and left Andrew’s office. As she entered the hallway, she tried to take comfort in his words—that Mark’s problems might not be about her at all and that eventually she would meet someone who would see Dirk for the amazing young man he was. But the cheerful thoughts didn’t brighten her mood. Part of her didn’t believe she was ever going to meet someone that farsighted. Part of her didn’t want to meet anyone else.
She leaned against the wall and sighed. There was a truth she could have gone another few years without knowing. That she didn’t want to meet Mr. Perfect. Instead she wanted Mark to be the man of her dreams. She wanted him to stop acting strange and fall in love with her. She wanted him to meet her brother and be okay with Dirk and what his special circumstances meant.
Darcy told herself to get real. Wishing for the moon was only a waste of time. She would be better off convincing herself that Mark was a jerk and that she should be happy he was out of her life. Unfortunately, she didn’t believe that one, either.
* * *
“Hey Mark, where’s the pretty lady with the cinnamon rolls?” Josh Anderson asked as Mark walked into the gym on Sunday morning.
“Busy.”
“Too bad. She’s a great cook.” Josh eyed him speculatively. “Not bad looking, either.”
Instead of answering, Mark grunted. If he were any kind of decent human being he would tell Josh that Darcy was indeed a great cook and very pretty. She was also smart, funny and incredible in bed. He grimaced. Okay, so he should probably keep that last bit to himself. But he could tell Josh the rest of it. After all, the thirty-something contractor was single. If Mark didn’t want Darcy for himself…
He shrugged out of his jacket, then pulled off his sweatpants and sweatshirt until he was down to shorts and a T-shirt. No way was he going to encourage Josh in the Darcy department. He tried telling himself it was because she was a suspect in a police investigation, but he knew that wasn’t it at all. He might not want Darcy for himself, but he sure as hell didn’t want any other guy sniffing around her.
The rest of the guys showed up and the game began. Mark found it difficult to keep his concentration on the ball and his teammates. Conversation flowed around him. He tried to participate, but a large part of his brain was too busy reminding him how long it had been since he’d last seen Darcy.
Nearly a week, he thought as Josh passed him the basketball. Mark headed for the far end of the court and tipped the ball into the net. He barely heard the calls of congratulations from his side and the boos from their opponents.
What was she thinking, he wondered. Had she noticed he hadn’t been around? He shook his head as he realized that wasn’t a fair question. Of course, she would have noticed. She wasn’t Sylvia. Darcy didn’t have an agenda. Although if she was laundering money, then the last thing she would want was to get involved with a detective. Unless she thought she could fool him. Which brought back too many uncomfortable memories.
A week. He hated that he missed her. Nearly as bad, he didn’t feel comfortable going to the Hip Hop, so he’d been forced to actually cook a couple of meals. That had been a disaster.
“Heads up, Kincaid,” someone called. A second later, the basketball slammed into his back.
Mark turned. Josh glared at him. “Are you playing or what?”
