Sharing a look, Erin and I both doubted that.
Joyce finally rid her mouth of food. ‘Trust me. I’m an expert.’
CHAPTER25
I’d often wondered how actors managed to look like they were eating when they weren’t. Thanks to Joyce’s masterclass, I finally had the answer. Worthy of her own Oscar, the woman’s sleight of hand was impressive.
I watched her cut into her pasta and push it around her plate, manipulating it in such a way that her portion appeared to shrink. She put her fork to her mouth numerous times, but on close inspection her food never really touched her lips, let alone made it into her belly.
Following Joyce’s suggestion, both Erin and I did our best to follow her lead, but neither of us had anywhere near as much success.
Unable to take any more, I put my knife and fork down. Filling my cheeks with air, I exhaled pretending I was full. ‘I couldn’t eat another morsel,’ I said.
Erin threw herself back in her seat. ‘Same here.’
I took in Richard’s confident expectation as he looked to each of us. It seemed the awkwardness around the table was palpable to all but him.
He rubbed his hands together. ‘So, what did you think?’
Joyce put her palms up, withdrawing herself from the discussion. ‘You already know what an admirable job I think you’re doing.’
As Richard’s gaze fell on me, I shifted in my seat. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt him. I picked up my glass of wine and taking a huge gulp, hoped it would help me swallow the ball of minced beef that had stuck in my gullet. ‘Your cooking ability has certainly come as a surprise.’ I picked up a napkin and wiped my mouth.
Chin held high, Richard looked to Joyce with a satisfied smile. ‘Did you hear that, love?’
I pushed my plate away. ‘I’ve never tasted a bolognaise like it.’
‘It certainly has some interesting flavours,’ Erin said.
Richard beamed. ‘That’ll be the secret ingredients I mentioned.’
‘I’m only sorry I couldn’t finish.’
Richard’s eyes lit up. ‘Then why don’t I do you a doggy bag?’
‘No!’ As Richard’s joy vanished, Erin realised the sharpness of her tone. She composed herself. ‘I’m sorry, Richard. It’s just that I’ve got this embarrassing medical condition.’ She put a hand up to her chest and in typical Erin-style, spoke with such confidence. ‘It’s rare, so you might not have heard of it. But I suffer from Oompa-loompa-ti-itis.’
While I raised my eyebrows, convinced there was no way Richard would fall for that, Joyce let out a loud snigger. Immediately correcting it with a coughing fit, she picked up her glass of wine and taking a drink, tapped her chest to further disguise her amusement.
‘And while tonight’s menu has been a bit of a treat,’ Erin continued. ‘If I eat too much pasta… Well, you of all people know the dangers of eating the wrong foods.’
Richard opened his mouth to speak but Erin interrupted him.
‘Don’t worry,’ she said. ‘It’s not life threatening. I just turn orange. It’s like jaundice, you see. But without the yellow.’
As we all stared at Erin, dumbfounded, the doorbell rang signalling Gideon’s arrival.
CHAPTER26
My stomach grumbled as I stood at the hob stirring the soup I’d opened for dinner. But while my body wanted something more substantial, with Gideon’s digestive system still recovering from Richard’s spaghetti bolognaise and me having not long shut up the shop, I had neither the time nor the inclination to cook up two different dishes.
My chest felt light, as if warning me something was about to happen. To calm my anxiety, I watched the spoon go round and round, all the while breathing in tandem with the circular motion. I checked the clock. It wouldn’t be long before Gideon landed, and I wondered what he’d have to say for himself.
Gideon and I hadn’t properly talked since meeting at Copington Christmas Market. After he’d explained Julia’s presence, we’d wandered around the stalls for a time. However, unlike the couples around us who’d kept each other close, we remained feet apart. Our conversation had been polite, but we were both as uncomfortable as each other. Me, because I wasn’t sure I believed his reason for being there. Gideon, because he wasn’t sure I believed him either.
He’d walked me back to the car park, and I hadn’t seen him since, apart from at Richard’s thank-you dinner, which wasn’t exactly heart-to-heart conducive.
Having missed the opportunity to learn from Joyce’s food vanishing masterclass, Gideon proved himself a real trooper. When it came to clearing his huge plate of food, forkful after forkful went into his mouth and all under Richard’s watchful eye. It was a spaghetti bolognaise that none of us would ever forget, and Erin, Joyce and I couldn’t help but admire Gideon’s stoicism. I still hadn’t figured out Richard’s secret ingredients. Thanks to Gideon’s subsequent tummy issues, I considered this a blessing.
