“Unbelievable.”
“I’m not proud of any of it.”
Flick sneered.
“And I really did want to marry you. Just not then. It wasn’t the right time.”
She folded her arms tight across her chest. “Again, you asked me.”
“You were so upset with what was happening to your dad, it was like watching you fall apart. I just wanted you to be happy, to have a reason to smile.”
Flick thought back to that awful time. Her dad was her hero, a man capable of anything. He was always so emotionally and physically strong. Then one day, all his strength went, just like that. Seeing him so vulnerable had been devastating and she couldn’t count the number of times she prayed for him to get well. As for Matthew’s proposal, ithadshone a light into all of the darkness. Of course, back then she’d thought he really did want to spend the rest of his life with her. She’d thought that her father’s condition had reminded Matthew about what was important, hence his need to show Flick how much he loved her. How could she have been so foolish?
“So, you felt sorry for me? You asked me to marry you out of pity?”
“Come on, Flick, stop twisting my words.”
She sighed. How else was she supposed to interpret it all?
“I just hated seeing you like that. I wanted to do something to help. And then your dad died and things got worse.”
Flick’s back straightened and her hackles rose. “What’s Dad got to do with any of this? Please tell me you’re not about to blame him for your actions?”
“Of course not. The problem was you.”
“Me?” Flick had heard everything.
“You became so needy,” Matthew said.
“Excuse me?”
“I don’t know how else to describe it. You weren’t eating properly, you cried all the time, like you hadn’t done enough of that already. Then after the funeral, instead of trying to get on with things you just gave up.”
“I was grieving.”
“I know that. But I felt like your carer, not your future husband.”
Flick knew her dad’s death had hit her hard and that she’d struggled to get back to normality. And, yes, she appreciated she’d probably leant on Matthew for support. But wasn’t that what partners did in times of need?
“And then when you did sort yourself out, our wedding became more about your parents than us. You kept going on about their perfect marriage, insisting ours would be the same.”
Flick stared at him, incredulous. “That’s because I thought it would be.”
“Nobody’s perfect, Flick. No relationship is perfect.”
“Just because your mum and dad couldn’t make things work.”
“And just because yours could.”
Flick fell momentarily silent. Despite all the crap pouring out of his mouth, she could see he had a point there at least.
“It all got too much. Our life together was never going to live up to your expectations. We’re us. Me and you, not them.”
“None of this explains why you went through with the wedding though, does it? Or why you did a runner after the fact.”
“No, it doesn’t. And I’m sorry. I should have talked to you, expressed how I was feeling.”
Flick waited for him to continue, but he chose to do nothing of the sort. Instead, he sat there playing the innocent, as if he were the victim. She waited some more, before her patience ran out. “It seems you’ve said what you came to say.” She rose to her feet. “So now you can leave.”
