Annabel returned her attention to Katy and decided it best to ignore Rebecca and her cat complaints altogether. ‘I know exactly what Tom would say,’ she said. ‘But we’re not talking about him, are we? We’re talkingaboutme.’
* * *
Sittingin one of the armchairs in the lounge, Dan quietly watched over his mother as she slept on the sofa. She seemed so at peace when asleep, to the point that Dan wished sleep would come to her more often. It had to be a welcome relief from the increasing agitation she experienced when awake, a sure sign that her medication was losing its power over the pain. One of the reasons he wanted his mum to listen when he suggested she might be more comfortable upstairs. But as always, the very idea had been poo-pooed.Taking to her bed,as his mother put it, would be too much like giving in. Although Dan wasn’t stupid, he knew her reluctance had more to do with the actual climbing of the staircaseitself.
He continued to observe his mum and found himself insisting he’d give anything to take away her suffering. Offered the chance, he’d exchange places with her in aninstant.
He took in the photo album lying on the coffee table, wondering which of her memories she’d been reminiscing about today. She’d taken to going through their many snapshots just before her naps, almost as if she wanted to impress each and every image to mind should she not wake up. He leaned forward and reached for the album to see for himself; his sudden movement causing his mother to stir. He stopped, holding his breath as he willed her to stay asleep and, much to his relief, she seemed to settlebackdown.
Dan picked up the album and, after getting himself comfortable in the armchair again, began slowly turning its pages. He couldn’t help but smile as, photo after photo, his mum and dad stared back at him. In some of them they were goofing around, in others there was definitely a bit of posing going on. Throughout though, they were clearly at ease in front of the camera and no one could deny the feelings they had for each other, their togetherness leapt off of the pages. The family of two soon turned to three and Dan started to recognise himself in the photos. He’d been too young to remember when any of them were taken, but his parent’s clearly adored him. In every shot, their love for him was as evident as their love for eachother.
‘What time is it?’ his mum suddenlyasked.
Surprised that his mother had awoken, Dan let the photo album rest on his lap. He checked the clock on the mantelpiece. Disappointingly, she’d slept for less than an hour. ‘Almost six-thirty,’ hereplied.
‘Shouldn’t you be getting ready by now?’ she said. She gradually eased herself into a more uprightposition.
‘There’snorush.’
‘Still, it’s a big night and you need to lookyourbest.’
Dan didn’t want to even think about the evening ahead. There was no getting out of it, of course, which did nothing to help his sense of foreboding. But at least he could delay the inevitable for a little whilelonger.
‘I know,’ he said. ‘Don’t worry.Iwill.’
He raised the album and continued to browse itspages.
‘It’s funny how the brain works,’ said his mum. ‘I can forget what I’m doing from one minute to the next, yet I remember each and every one of those photos being taken like it was onlyyesterday.’
‘That’s old age for you,’saidDan.
His mum laughed. ‘I wouldn’t mock,’ she replied. ‘It comes to us alleventually.’
She indicated for him to pass her the album, and Dan joined her on the sofa. Perching himself on the edge, he angled it so that they could both see the images without her having to movetoomuch.
‘Now this,’ said his mum, pointing to one photograph in particular. ‘Is one of my favourites. You were two years old and it was the first time we’d taken you to the beach. Boy, did youhateit.’
Dan stared at the young child in the picture. With his unruly blonde hair, big blues eyes, and great big smile, it was fair to say he’d been cute back in the day. Sitting in a deckchair, his shoeless, podgy feet just about hung over the edge of the seat and his arm was outstretched, as if pointing to something out of shot. Surrounded by blue skies and the orange sand typical of many UK beaches, it seemed your usual family outing. ‘I look happy enough,’hesaid.
‘That’s because you’re sitting down,’ his mum replied. ‘It was the sand you didn’t like. Every time we put you on your feet, you froze for a second before bursting into tears. You were so funny. We put it down to you not liking the feel of the stuff. You were the same with grass for awhiletoo.’
Dan smiled. He couldn’t remember a second of it. ‘Those were thedays,eh?’
‘Theycertainlywere.’
They carried on browsing for a while; Dan listened intently as his mum animatedly filled in the details of this photograph and that photograph. She seemed in her element back then, and now. Dan smiled, able to understand why. The images proved just how good life had been. Perfect, in fact, the way his mothertoldit.
He began to wonder if he, himself, would be ever lucky enough to experience this. In years to come, would he sit on a sofa with his own children, looking back on a lifetime of memories filled with real love? At the moment, it was hard to imagine. He struggled to get his head around the possibility that he and Maeve could ever share the depth of feeling that his parents had shared. He just had to hope that, in time, things would change, that he’d start to think about Maeve in the same way he thought about Annabel. His heart sank. Funny how he could only admit his strength of feeling for the woman once they’d calledthingsoff.
‘Are you okay?’ askedhismum.
Dan fixed a smile on his face. ‘I’m fine. Why doyouask?’
‘You have that faraway look in your eyes again,’ she replied. ‘Anything you want to talkabout.’
She’d accused him of that a lot these last couple of weeks, but Dan didn’t see the point in talking. He’d made his decision, even before Annabel suggested they call itaday.
He pictured Annabel’s face the last time they’d met. He could have sworn she’d been disappointed when he agreed it was probably for the best. He realised he’d imagined it, of course; foolish wishful thinking that she might feel for him what he felt for her. He took a deep breath, determined to dismiss all thoughts of the woman fromhishead.
