Panic and blood roared in my ears.
What if something happened to her?
I closed my hand in her hair again and pulled.
“You’ve had some higher blood pressure readings and I am not going to fuck around with you or your baby’s health. We are going to the hospitalnow.”
Her breath caught, and I felt her heartbeat flutter.
“All right, Ambrose.”
I grabbed the hospital bag and guided her out the door and into the passenger seat of my car.
“Finn is going to charter a private plane to get here as fast as he can,” she said as we sped down the highway.
“All right,” I said. “If you want me to go when he comes, just tell me.”
I felt tense and panicked.
What if we didn’t get there in time?
What if there were complications?
What if I fainted again?
This time, I was determined not to be such an embarrassing mess, so I had bought ginger chews to combat my nausea and immediately I stuffed three of them in my mouth.
I was determined to be there for Indi for as long as she wanted me there.
We got quickly set up and Indi bounced on a birthing ball for a while, but it wasn’t long before her contractions were coming closer now. Every 5 minutes. Then every 3 minutes. Then every 2 minutes.
When I felt light-headed, I dug my nails into my palms and focused on encouraging her.
Good girl, Indi
You’re doing so well
I had been prepared for so many worst-case scenarios, but I hadn’t expected the gut punch when a nurse told me,
“You’re doing good, daddy.”
“Oh, I’m—not the daddy,” I said awkwardly. “I’m just a guy who’s in love with her.”
She gave me a bit of a strange look, but then Indi was in the hospital bed and it was time to push.
Astrid hadn’t wanted to see my face at all in labor, so I felt a lump in my throat when Indi gripped my hand as she pushed, bearing down as hard as she could.
Like maybe she didn’t hate me. Like maybe she did want me there.
And even when the baby’s head crowned, I was determined not to fail her. I dug my nails so hard into my palms they bled and I didn’t faint on her.
Doing perfect, Indi
I can see her head
She looks perfect
Almost done now
