She closed her eyes, as if that would contain the flood. “The, uh, therapist thinks we should keep things as they are now for a while. The boys have made such a smooth transition here… I wouldn’t want to do anything to interfere with that.”
“By letting them see their father?”
“It’s much more complicated than that, as you certainly know.”
“I miss them, Kath. I miss you all.”
“I go by Kendall now, and I’m not sure what you want me to say, Phil. I didn’t create this situation. I’m just trying to survive it.”
“I’m sorry,” he said, sobbing. “I’m so sorry for everything.”
“I know you are, but that doesn’t change my reality or the boys’. I have to do what’s right for them.”
“I’ve been sober for ninety-six days. I haven’t missed a single meeting.”
“I’m happy for you. Congratulations.” He’d made it to one hundred and ninety-four days the last time he got sober before relapsing for a third time.
“This latest rehab was outstanding. I feel different this time. I know you have no reason to believe me, but it’s true.”
“I hope with all my heart it sticks, for your sake and the boys’.”
“But not yours?”
“We’re divorced, Phil. It’s over between us. I’m not sure what else you want me to say, and having this same conversation every few weeks doesn’t help with the healing I’m working so hard to do. It just reopens the wound, which isn’t healthy.”
“What am I supposed to do? Not care about you and our sons anymore?”
“I never said that. But you need to leave us alone to recover from the ordeal you put us through. That’s what we’re doing here, and it’s going well so far. I’ll text you updates and photos of the boys, but please don’t call me again. I just can’t put myself through this anymore.”
“My mother wants to see the kids.”
“She knows she can text me any time she wants to come out.”
“She doesn’t want to go to the island.”
“Well, I’m sorry, but that’s where we live now.”
“So that’s permanent?”
“Maybe. We’re happy here. It’s peaceful. We’re surrounded by family. The boys are making some great friends, and they love their school.” After a pause, she added, “I have to go now. I have work to do.”
“Where are you working?”
“At a lawyer’s office.”
“So you’re practicing on the island?”
“Yes.”
“When you said you were going there, I didn’t think it would be forever.”
“You forced us to make a whole new life for ourselves. What did you expect?”
“I don’t know, but not this. Not never seeing my kids.”
“There’s so much I could say to that, but it’s all been said a million times before. Please don’t call me again.”
Kendall ended the call before he could say anything else that would drive the knife deeper into her broken heart. She dropped her head into her hands as the tears flowed freely. Nothing had ever devastated her more than the demise of her marriage and the loss of the man she’d expected to spend the rest of her life with. She’d fought for him for years before she’d pulled the plug, realizing she couldn’t put her life and those of her sons on hold indefinitely while she hoped for something that wasn’t going to happen.
