What the heck was I thinking? Now he’ll believe the option is open for later on.
Judging from his laugh, Noah is thinking the same thing.
“Have you ever had sex in the shower?” He asks the question as if it’s nothing more than small talk, but the smile playing at the corner of his mouth is hard to miss.
“Haven’t we already established that we aren’t talking about my sex life?” I try to keep my tone on this side of scandalized, but it’s hard to do that when his question has me intrigued.
Shower sex sounds like something Charlotte would have done with her mysterious fiancé. It was never anything that Mathew and I ever did.
Maybe we should have.
Maybe then he wouldn’t have cheated on me with my best friend…or any other woman.
He’s a player, a voice in my head points out.He always was, always will be. You were just too busy ignoring the truth to see it.
And in time, he’ll probably cheat on Tiffany, too.
“I’m sorry, Princess,” Noah says on a laugh. “But I can’t help myself.”
The rest of our conversation is much tamer. He tells me about his day. And I tell him about the letters between Charlotte and her mystery man, and how neither Meg nor Tilly knew him or remembered Charlotte talking about him.
“Do you think he died during the war?” he asks.
“There’s a good chance that’s what happened. That, or he changed his mind about being with Charlotte and disappeared. But either way, I’m learning more about my great-aunt than I knew before. I still haven’t figured out why she never fell in love with anyone else. Maybe she believed John was her soul mate.”
“Do you believe in soul mates?”
“Definitely not. Which is a good thing, given that the last man I fell in love with—and only man I’ve ever been in love with—ended up cheating on me. With my best friend. I’d like to think that he wasn’t my only chance for love. I’d also like to believe that the next one will be faithful.”
Because if he isn’t, I’m becoming a nun.
It’s not too late to become a nun if you’ve already had sex, is it?
“What happened to the girl he cheated on you with? Are you two still friends?” If his expression is anything to go by, there’s a good chance he’s hoping the answer to that will be no.
“Yes, because I forgave her. I guess you can thank the near-death situation for that. The day I discovered her in bed with my boyfriend, I escaped his house with the goal of getting away for a few days. I didn’t exactly want to talk to anyone about it. It was both humiliating and a humongous kick in the butt to my self-esteem. I needed to figure out my game plan. Instead, I was on the highway when a delivery truck lost control and I ended up in a near-fatal accident. What about you? Do you believe in soul mates?”
His face reddens, his hands tighten on the steering wheel, and I think his teeth might have just been ground to a fine powder. “Wait a second! That’s the car accident that resulted in your injured leg? Your boyfriend cheats on you with your best friend, he gets laid, and you almost died?”
“Er, yeah, that’s one way to put it. So about that soul mate stuff.…”
“And you just forgave them because you were in the accident and almost died? An accident you wouldn’t have been in if you hadn’t caught him cheating on you?”
“Well, it’s not so much that I forgave Tiffany as I let it go because we travel in the same circles. It was easier that way. And don’t get too far ahead of yourself in thinking I forgave my ex. If his man parts spontaneously fall off, that’s because I cursed him a few thousand times while I was recovering for that to happen.” I smirk at Noah. He doesn’t see it, his attention still on the road. “I thought that would be fair enough revenge. But you also have to remember that all Mathew did was cheat on me. He wasn’t the one who caused the accident. It was just dumb luck that I was in the wrong place at the wrong time.”
For a second, it looks as if Noah is going to argue that, but I guess he must have realized I’m right. I’m used to that response. Troy and Drew and my stepbrothers all had the same reaction when they found out what happened.
But I do plead the fifth when it comes to how a cement truck accidentally dumped its contents into Mathew’s sports car a few months after the accident. The top had been down on the convertible at the time. I had nothing to do with it.…But I have a suspicion I know who the guilty party is.
“Anyway, that’s all in the past,” I remind Noah. “But my question still stands. Do you believe in soul mates?”
“Nope. Not at all.”
“And you’ve never been in love?”
His anger on my behalf abates, to be replaced by some other raw emotion that has nothing to do with me. He rubs the back of his neck but doesn’t say anything.
Interesting.
