I closed the door after her and stood there for a moment, my back against it, eyesshut.
Was it really too much to hope for that when I reopened them, everything would be back to how it was three months ago? That I wasn’t pregnant and wouldn’t have to face Josh about our currentdilemma?
With a hard breath, I pushed away from the door and joined Josh in the living room. He was skimming through theWhat To Expectbook. Naturally, my heart took this the wrong way and squeezed hopefully. I blamed the pregnancy hormones for that. They really were annoying littlebuggers.
Josh glanced up. I knew I should say something, but I wasn’t sure what else to say. If this situation was covered inWhat To Expect, I hadn’t found that chapter yet. “Just so you know, I hadn’t planned to get pregnant. I just wanted a good fuck to help me deal with Nanna’s death.” And to help me deal with mymum.
Wasn’t irony just abitch?
“I know it was an accident. And I’m pretty sure if I remember my biology class correctly, it takes two to make a baby. You didn’t take advantage of me, Holly. I was as much a willing participant as youwere.”
Relief rushed through me that at least he didn’t blameme.
“So what’s the plan?” heasked.
“I’m keeping the baby.” The words came out easier thanexpected.
“I kinda figured as much.” His mouth slid into my favorite, teasing smirk. “The pregnancy and baby books gave itaway.”
I smiled, the movement small, but then the smile faded as I stared at the face of my new reality. And no, I didn’t mean Josh. “I know you don’t want children. Your hockey career comes first. So if you wish to walk away from this, I’m all right with that. I’m giving you thechoice.”
If my life were a romance novel, this was the part where Josh would sweep me off my feet and tell me he could never walk away. That he wanted his baby and me to be a major part of his life—and alwayswould.
Of course, if my life were more like a Stephen King novel, a scary clown would crash through the door and drag Josh down a sewage pipe—leaving Junior without afather.
At least that would be easier to explain to our child.It wasn’t that your daddy didn’t want to be your daddy. It was totally the clown’sfault.
If that didn’t cause a fear of clowns, I didn’t know whatwould.
Josh frowned. “News flash, Holly. I’m not my fucking father. Yes, neither of us planned this, but I’m not walking away. I plan to be there for you and the baby as much as you’ll letme.”
Okay, not quite the first option—but at least the scary clown keptaway.
Did you notice what he didn’tsay?
That’s right. There was no romantic gesture. Our goal was to keep our relationship uncomplicated. Well, as uncomplicated as you could get when you were having ababy.
He picked up the yoga DVD. “What’sthis?”
“Yoga for pregnancy. I thought it might be beneficial for thebaby.”
Josh glanced around the room. “How ’bout we startnow?”
“Startwhat?”
“Yoga. The Rock goalies swear by it, and you’ve seen how fucking flexible they are. It wouldn’t hurt me to do it with you.” He moved the coffee table against the wall to give us some morespace.
“But we don’t have any yogamats.”
“I’m sure we can go without this time. I’ll pick some up beforetomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?”
“If there’s one thing training for hockey has taught me, it’s important to schedule yourworkouts.”
Now it wasmyturn to smirk. Josh wasn’t known for scheduling anything. He was a spur-of-the-moment typeguy.
The only exception? Hockey—naturally.