I held up my hands as he approached. All at once, my eyes took in everything around me and listed out another round of stupid infractions.
No street lamp overhead. Cars in shadow.
No one nearby. Barely any cars on the road.
Surrounded by trees.
No one knew I was there.
“Ricky. Listen. Can we go somewhere else?”
Mistake. Mistakemistakemistakemistake—!
He moved like a viper. Well, his arm did at least. One moment he stood before me, the next my belly exploded with pain as he was suddenly over me, first buried in my stomach. Knocked the wind right out of me. My entire chest cavity burned like I had taken a cannonball right in my sternum.
I collapsed onto him as my hands clutched my stomach. He propped me up and cooed in my ear. The fuck?
“Come on, baby, why you gotta be like this?” he said. “You know you fucked up, right? Fucked upbig-time.”
I tried to speak. Gibberish left my lips. I couldn’t even take a breath to vocalize anything.
“What’s that? You’re sorry? Trying to say you’re sorry? Fuck. Too late for that.”
Suddenly I was shoved against my car. Ricky had a fistful of my shirt. My eyes went wide. This time I saw it coming and I didn’t have the strength or dexterity to move away. I could only brace myself as his fist connected with my jaw.
Stars. Explosions of white fireworks in my vision, followedimmediately by a pain I had never known. Cancer had made me uncomfortable. Cancer had given me the endurance to tolerate long, dull pain. But this? My body didn’t know how to cope. Did he knock my jaw clear off? It felt like every neuron in my face reported to my brain that I was moments from death.
I was on the ground, though I didn’t remember falling. Ricky hauled me to my feet and I could barely stand. Another hit, this one from his left hand that connected to my temple. A right jab took me right in the teeth. Blood sprayed. Nose broke from another hit.
I stopped keeping track when he stepped back and planted a boot into my gut. I hit the ground again. He kicked wherever he could. I curled into a fetal position involuntarily, a vestigial reflex to protect my body from the predator looking to take my life.
I lost consciousness when his heel slammed into the side of my head.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Rome
I’MNOTPROUDto admit that I pretended to sleep. Alex did a mighty fine job when we moved as a single entity from the shower to the bedroom. Helped me out in all the right ways. Made me so, so happy to see him again after only a few days away. Afterward, lying together, he encouraged me to take a nap and sleep off the jet lag that had consumed me from all the traveling. Bless his heart, he stayed in bed until my eyes stayed closed for awhile.
My eyes shot open when he closed the door to the bedroom. My mind had been racing on how to talk to him. Something was up. Something hadchanged. And not from the incredible, amazing, life-altering sex since our admission of love back in Rhode Island. No, Alex was keeping something from me.
The realization had only come after I left for Annapolis. The distance from him gave me time to reminisce about our time together during my break, which then allowed me to explore the moments. I found inconsistencies in there. Where Alex had once been adamant about keeping to his shooting schedule, he loosened up. Suddenly, Alex had a lot of free time. For me. I didn’t like that—I had purposefully set boundaries for myself to respect his time, his occupation. Yes, I could certainly take careof us for the rest of lives many times over, but Alex was an artist and loved photography. There was no reason for me to pull him away from that just because I could easily pay the bills.
Snooping was beneath me. Besides, I trusted him. I didn’t think he was seeing someone else. All of this felt like… I didn’t know how to describe it. Agoodsecret. Like a big, wrapped box sitting under the Christmas tree just waiting to be opened. But what was it?
We confessed our love for each other. Wemadelove to each other. He expressed desire to move in with me. What else could he be hiding…?
Marriage?
No. I rejected that immediately. That was too soon.
A home?
That could have been. I would live anywhere with Alex, even in his current apartment. Heck, I’d buy him a manor house if he let me. I already owned homes in Florida, Rhode Island, and Sicily. What was a fourth?
One that he wants to contribute to, idiot.
I stared at the ceiling of my bedroom, hands tucked behind my head. Yes. I could picture it now. Alex real estate shopping. Trying to find the best place for us. Something he could afford but big enough for me and my ego (or so he thought). Close enough to the stadium but not a bad distance from Rhode Island and my family. Maybe he planned a few days for us to hit the open houses together during a break?
