A moment later, a towel was thrown their way. With shaking fingers, Andy wrapped his hand up. “Fraser, just breathe,” they said softly. “You’re all right, pal. I don’t think it’s that deep.”
But it was. It was so deep that he didn’t know where to go next. It was so deep that he saw her everywhere he looked: painting the wall by the staircase, tapping on her keyboard in the dining room, crouched lovingly beside Bernard.
“Fraser,” Andy repeated.
He was sweating. When had he started sweating?
Andy sighed, turning to Jack again. “There’s a first aid kit in the kitchen cupboard. Could you get it, please?”
“Aye, of course.” Jack left the room.
Gently, Andy guided Fraser backwards. “Sit down on the stairs. You look like you’re going to pass out on me.”
He felt like it, growing dizzy. Together, they lowered onto the third step, knees bumping as Andy edged closer to inspect his finger. He worked up the courage to look at it, glad to find the blood flow was already slowing.
Andy breathed a sigh of relief. “It isn’t as deep as it looked. You just caught the tip.” Pressure squeezed around his shoulder, and it took him a moment to realise it was Andy’s hand soothing him. “Fraser, what the fuck is going on with you? You don’t make mistakes.”
“I do, actually.” His voice cracked. “Big ones.”
Rattles emerged from the kitchen, echoing down the empty hallway. Clearly, Jack was having trouble finding the first aid kit.
Fraser was glad. Andy seeing him like this was one thing, but Jack… He wouldn’t get it.
He wasn’t sure anybody would.
“What’ve you done? Where is Harper?” Andy asked, face creased with concern.
He shook his head. “Gone. She’s gone home.”
“Why?”
“I told her to. She had a job interview back in Manchester.”
“But she didn’t say anything to me,” Andy said. “We were planning the reopening!”
“Because she wasn’t going to leave so soon until I drove her away.” Bitterness seeped into his tone, burning his tongue like acid. “I freaked out.”
Andy blinked. “That much is clear.”
“I started caring too much.”
“Is that a bad thing?” They cocked their head. “You’ve always cared too much. About everyone. You’re the first person anybody in this town calls when they need help.”
“Exactly. I feel like I’m always worrying about something. Mum, or my sisters, you and this place. If I care this much about someone else, about someone who isn’t family, how am I supposed to keep the rest of my life together?” He pressed his lips into a fine, miserable line, the corner of his mouth trembling. “My family needs me, and I can’t...” He sniffed, wiping his cheek with the back of his uninjured hand. It came away damp.“I can just about hold it together for them, but for her?” A sad chuckle. “For her, I’m already fucking ruined.”
“Oh, you silly, silly boy.” Andy shook their head slowly, placing his bloody hand in theirs. “You silly, silly, silly boy.”
“I’m really glad I chose you to confide in. You always know the right thing to say,” he groused.
They tutted, though their expression was laced with sympathy. “Fraser. Why do you think I stay far, far away from relationships?”
“Because you have a cold, cold heart?”
“Yes, but no. Because I have a B&B to run, and it’s sort of hard work.” They lowered their gaze to his hand, applying more pressure with the towel. “If somebody made me feel the way she makes you feel, mad enough to cut my bloody finger off, I would be terrified, too. I wouldn’t be brave enough to let them all the way in, not even into this place, even if it would be better run with a partner like my parents did it. But this is my home, and it’s all I’ve ever known, and why would I risk someone hurting not just me, but this, too?”
“Here it is!” Jack startled both of them, emerging from the kitchen with the green first aid kit in his hand. He placed it beside them on the step, scratching his rough beard. “Should I call an ambulance, or what?”
“No. Sit down. We’re having an intervention,” Andy demanded.
