While his hand draws soothing circles over my back, his other is firmly placed on my lower back, keeping me attached to him. It feels safe. It feels good. He feels good. Big and strong and capable.
I don’t know how long he’s been holding me like that, but when my cries finally subside, I weakly push away from him. I don’t want to detach from him, but he’s right, we need food to help our situation.
I climb off him and go back to my previous spot.
“Thank you, Ezra. Really.” I wipe my nose with my slightly burned forearm. “I came off as a very ungrateful person at first. I know that.” He opens his mouth to say something, but I raise my finger, silencing him. “But I think I was just in shock. I’m usually okay, you know. But for some reason, it took me a minute to catch up. I’m sorry and thank you.”
“Don’t apologize.” His voice sounds very rough even though I know he doesn’t mean for it to be that way. Ezra happens to be a decent guy. Deep inside.
I shake my head. “I have to. I’m just so used to living on my own that it’s hard to accept any help.”
“Because it always comes with a price?” he asks carefully, and my head whips to him.
“Yes.” I watch his face more carefully, thinking there might be some hidden, dark secrets under his Adonis appearance.
“I understand.”
“You do,” I confirm, believing him too easily because I know he really does.
“Maeve?”
“Hm?”
“My help comes free. Okay?”
I swallow a dry lump before replying. “Okay.”
The corner of his lips quirks up in a half smile, making a stiff man suddenly look like a playful guy. “I wouldn’t mindyou giving me a helping hand carrying coconuts to our house.”
“Not for free?” I ask dramatically.
“Of course not.” He smiles.
“Phew,” I exhale. “Got me scared there for a second. I thought for a moment you were beingnice. Don’t go all soft on me now, Tarzan.”
19
Ezra
As we walk back to the shelter, I keep thinking about her words. And how her body trembled in my arms. Even though she was right atop my dick, it didn’t feel sexual. Even though I have to admit it felt very good.
What I did feel is her breaking apart. It broke me too. I don’t know how to comfort anyone, let alone a woman. Yet it felt natural to wrap my arms around her and just hold her while she let it all out. I held her until her body stopped shaking and her breathing became normal again.
I wanted to hold her longer, but she pushed away. Gently, yes, but it was a sign to let go. At least one of us has a working head on their shoulders.
Somehow, in this span of a few days, she’s shifted from being the menace of my existence to someone connected to me for the time being. No matter how long or short it might be. And I must take care of her until then.
“How do you know about chickens?” She walks ahead of me, so she has to keep glancing back at me when she talks.
It’s nice to see someone paying attention to me when they talk and not being stuck in their own business.Is that how people around me usually feel?I’ve been focused on my work for so long, my phone has become an extension of myself, so my attention to anyone is never one hundred percent.
“We spent summers with my grandma on a farm in Arkansas,” I say, feeling a sudden ball of warmth in my chest. Those were the times when my brother and I wereseen. When our father noticed that we were like any other normal kids every time we came back to New York, he quickly stopped our visits, saying that we were becoming too soft for what he had in mind for us.
“Really?” She squints like she’s searching for something on my face. “I didn’t take you for a country guy.”
“I’m not,” I snort.
She throws me a funny look. “I beg to differ. You seemed very knowledgeable when you dove right under those birdies.” She demonstrates how I picked up the eggs, looking way more dramatic than I was. “And you knew they had more eggs there and all that. I mean, wow. You’re Superman in my eyes.”
