He cleared his throat as he passed me in the doorway. “I must ensure it’s safe.” It only took him a few minutes and he was back to my side. “I will wait for you out here, if you need anything please yell.”
A frown tugged at the corners of my lips. I wanted to yell and scream. I wanted to tell him no. I wanted to beg the gods to take it back, that I hadn’t had enough time yet to figure out who I was.
“When you come out we will go visit Sita and have you fitted again for some new clothes.”
All I could do was nod before I disappeared into the steam.
Sita wastedno time to bow to me as I walked through the curtains into her shop. “I know greatness when I see it.”
I shook my head. “None of that. You aren’t allowed to act this way. You helped me sneak into a trunk and disappear into the night. We are well past these formalities.”
She chuckled. “I suppose you’re right.” She eyed Ryven in the corner of the tent with one of his hands poised over the sword hanging from his hip. I wondered if he still had the two swords at his back or if he didn’t care to carry both around the keep. “Will he be staying for your fitting?”
I swallowed back the emotions ready to choke me at any moment. I nodded my head, too afraid of what I would give away with my words. Out of all of this, Ryven was the hardest part I would have to get used to. I didn’t want to have to go through this with him. It hurt even more that he turned into a statue.
“Commander,” Sita addressed Ryven. “You may look over my entire shop if you wish before we go in for a fitting but I will not permit you to come back here while she undresses.”
Ryven’s eyes didn’t even flicker. He merely nodded and my nose burned with more suppressed emotions as he breezed by me and checked every darkened corner in Sita’s shop before he resumed his position by the door to her tent.
As soon as we were alone she turned on me. “What happened on the journey? You haven’t come to visit since you returned. I see the storm brewing in your gaze. What happened between the two of you?”
So as quickly and as quietly as I could I replayed the entire journey. Even the stuff I left out from Livia. The heated touches, almost kisses, and each time I woke up with his hand splayed across my naked abdomen. Her eyes widened as I divulged everything. “He’s practically a statue now.”
I nodded as a tear slipped down from the corner of my eye. By all means, I should have been angry with him, but now all I felt was sadness. I preferred the ass version of him over this. I even preferred the mean version over this. Anything but emotionless.
Sita flicked her dark hair over her shoulder before she stared me down in the mirror. “I know exactly what needs to be done tobreak through that stone-cold exterior. If he had feelings for you before, they’re still there. We just need to bring them out again. You’ll have to play dirty.”
I shook my head. “I don’t know if I want his attention after the way he spoke to me.”
Her mischievous grin only continued to grow. “You’ll make him grovel, don’t you worry.”
CHAPTER THREE
RYVEN
Just a few short days later, Alric came home. He paced the length of my living room as I told him of Juniper’s magic. I may have left out how it came to be but I had no doubts that Juniper would fill him in on that. Until then I could prepare myself for his anger.
“How are you holding up?” Alric finally asked when my tale was over.
I frowned. “What do you mean, how am I holding up? Aren’t you going to rush to Juniper’s room to ask her all about her magic and how she’s doing?” I could hardly believe what I was hearing.
His lips curled slightly in amusement. “I will later but you’re my friend and I know what happened to you before.”
“You mean how you saved me,” More guilt ate away at me as I thought about his tirade on what he’d given up for the Fraud Queen. How he’d been stripped of everything to be a spymaster because I was going to be killed. I was on the chopping block waiting on my execution when he came to my rescue. He was the only reason I stood here today.
“I think we saved each other,” Alric said softly as he patted my shoulder. “The fraud empire took everything from the bothof us. All we have to do now is take it back. We march into battle behind the woman who is kind but has no reason to be. We follow the true queen and we teach her everything we know on the way. If anyone deserves the crown it’s Juniper.”
But that didn’t change how I felt about her. How I yearned from her. How badly I wanted her. Nothing changed except I couldn’t act upon it. I could no longer get drunk and go after her. If anyone had to be on the top of their game, it was me. Possibly Alric too but I couldn’t ask that of him. As long as Juniper was in his care or with him, I could take a break but I could never know the freedom I had before. Juniper’s life came first. The queen’s life trumped everything else.
“Has she tried to use her magic again?” Alric asked as he looked toward her room.
I shrugged. “I have no idea. We don’t exactly speak.”
“You are not a machine. You can speak to her and interact with her.”
I shook my head. “No, I can’t because my body doesn’t know how to act right in her presence.”
Alric chewed on his lip and changed the subject. “Are we going to celebrate the winter solstice?”
