I ran my tongue over my teeth and didn’t say a word. I refused to speak to any of them for the rest of the night.
Chapter Fourteen
Aiyanna
The smellof alcohol and cigarettes clung to my body. I scrubbed at my hair until my fingers felt like they were going to start bleeding. Anger still hummed in my body and I knew if I didn’t get out of the shower I was going to end up on my ass from all this pent up rage.
Ian had used me to get under Derek’s skin. He must have noticed something I hadn’t and ran with it. When he had dropped me off at my apartment he leaned forward like he was going to kiss me. Except he just pulled me into his arms and held me. He didn’t seem like he was drunk either. He told me he was sorry and he just wanted to see Derek’s damaged soul happy. Whatever that meant. I could see the pain in Derek’s eyes but damaged? I didn’t know about that.
I had pushed Ian off of me and said, “I don’t want to be happy.” As I closed the door in his face.
My phone rang.Unknown.There was no room for happiness in my life.
Chapter Fifteen
Derek
Sixteen missed calls.
The sound of my phone ringing had woken me up several times throughout the night. I did a quick search to see how I could get past her stupid calls without missing calls from my team if they needed me. Something about aDo not disturboption. I clicked a few things and suddenly it was on. But now that I was up, there was no getting back to sleep. I put on my running shoes, grabbed my headphones, and tiptoed past Brody sleeping on the couch. I didn’t know why I cared about waking him, I usually didn’t. After all, he hadn’t been hazed yet. Maybe it was a part of me letting him think he was getting peace because next mission it was on. He would never be able to sleep peacefully again. He was young and dumb, but he was on the team now. Though he didn’t do anything with the rest of us. But now that I thought about it, I knew we didn’t invite him.
I shrugged as the door clicked closed behind me. When I turned around and slipped the key into my shorts I came face to face with a crying Alex.
“What the f-” I startled. Which was a shock itself. Not much surprised me these days. Especially after all the hazing I went through. My brothers had tried so hard to get me but there was nothing that surprised me or made me angry in front of them. They could poke at me and tattoo a penis on my face but I wouldn’t make a sound in front of them. Now alone, that was different.
“You didn’t answer.”
“Definitely not answering again.” I brushed past her.
“I’m pregnant.” The two words I never wanted to hear. The two words that would make anyone happy but all they did was make me angry. I had a temper but I didn’t let many see it. I kept walking. I could hear her shuffling to keep up behind me. “Do you care?”
“What do you want me to say to you?” I wheeled around to face her.
“That this is a good thing, I don’t know.”
I laughed then. “It isn’t a good thing. This is the worst thing that could happen to me. I don’t care what you do with it, but don’t include me.”
My words made me wince. I knew I was being harsh, but I didn’t believe it was mine. I made sure I didn’t procreate. I made sure I was safe. There was no way my first time back out in the game, I got someone pregnant, someone I didn’t even like.
“You’re heartless, just like they warned me.” Her voice broke. I wanted to apologize but there was no way that was happening now.
“Yes, I am. My soul is as black as tar, baby.” I put my headphones in my ears and started running. I didn’t care if she tried to keep up with me or not.
Chapter Sixteen
Aiyanna
I wrappedanother set of utensils and Vince sat down in front of me. He was early, the bar wasn’t supposed to open for a few hours. “You’re not giving the girls around here much job security.”
I tucked the napkins under the bar and shook my head. He was right, this wasn’t a job I needed to do but one I had gotten sucked into. It was a habit of mine and it kept my hands busy. “Sorry, I’m in my own little world.”
“I tried calling you this morning but the number was disconnected.” Vince looked over the empty bar.
I sighed. “I forgot to send you guys the new number. I’m sorry.”
“Five new numbers in six months isn’t normal, Aiyanna.” My hands trembled as I scribbled down the new phone number and slid it across the counter to him. “Do you need to get the police involved?”
“No,” I shook my head hard. “They can’t do anything.”
