Jarron slides open the door to the balcony looking over a small street with several beach houses lining it. The salty air feels amazing.
I haven’t been back here since—well, since the day after it happened. I have so many good memories of this place, though. This island is exclusive, for only select supernatural families which is why it was one of the few places Jarron and his brother could be free without fear. That night a vampire washed up on shore was a shocking development. Here, he can be open about who he is.
“So, how do we get down there if we can’t see the rest of the house?” I ask.
Jarron smirks just before he swoops me into his arms and leaps over the banister. I scream, but he’s in his demon form in an instant, wings spread wide to catch the wind, and we glide smoothly down to the street.
“Any more questions?” he asks in a cocky tone just before he drops me to my feet.
I shake off the fear of the moment, adrenaline still pumping. It’s truly bizarre being on these streets, just casually standing beside the very monster who shook my confidence in all things magic. The beast who chased me away from an entire world.
That heartbreak was sincere. We weren’t romantically involved back then, but losing a best friend that traumatically was just as painful.
I missed him, even while I hated him, and I used that rage to cover up my pain.
Jarron and I stroll down the streets, reminiscing about our time here. We pass Jarron’s parents’ house and my parents’ old house, and then we make our way to the beach just before we miss the final show of the sunset.
I shiver in the cool ocean breeze. He wraps his arms around me from behind, his warmth seeping into me.
“I’m glad I was able to be here for your birthday,” he tells me. “And I’m even more glad I could bring you here.”
I sigh against his warmth and comfort. “I’m glad too.”
37
How Do I Fix The Problem When it’s Me?
Everything is wrong, even while everything is perfect. It’s complete torture knowing that the man I adore is perfect and my actions are hurting him.
Jarron doesn’t know it yet, but I am lying and pushing him away, and he absolutely doesn’t deserve it.
I need you to trust me.
I do. I do trust him. Even while part of my mind fears the truth, I trust him. Somehow, he has my heart so fully that even when it makes no sense, I believe there has to be a way.
I lie beside Jarron in bed, wrestling with the silk sheets, restless the whole night.
I’m ready, I think. Ready to take the chance. To leap and find out how badly it will hurt when the ground rises up to meet me, crushing my heart to bits, or how amazing it will feel when Jarron’s wings catch the wind and carry us into the sky.
The problem is, if I fully give him that trust, Bea dies. As much as she’s done legitimate wrong and maybe deserves those consequences, I don’t want her to be harmed.
I made her a promise, and I don’t want to go back on it.
Hours of restlessness later, I finally come to an uneasy conclusion.
I need to tell her. I will tell Manuela to send a message to Bea.
Run.
Run because I’m going to tell him.
I’m going to choose Jarron this time.
* * *
“You seem tense,” Jarron comments the next morning. I look up from the book I’d been staring at without reading, trying to hide the fear pulsing through me.
“Really?” I force a smile. We’ve been in my workshop for the last hour while I think through how I’m going to pass along the message to Manuela without Jarron hearing it. He stays by my side nearly every moment.
