“Don’t get your hopes up,” I say. “I won’t promise love because I’m not sure I can feel it, but I can try to make this experience for you worth it.”
“What makes you say you can’t feel love?” Dean holds me still with a single glance.
I avert my gaze. “Love isn’t mundane. It’s this big feeling reserved for people who know what it is and what to do with it. Me?” I chuckle without humour. “I couldn’t spot love even if it hit me in the face.”
“You said you don’t feel it, then how would you know?”
“That’showI know,” impatience pressures between us. “Because love doesn’t exist inmyordinary. Dean, I don’t have the right tools for it. Plus, feelings like that always have an expiry date.”
Dean brushes his fingers against mine, toying with my limbs. “Love isn’t big or grand, Nova. It’s a seed. Sometimes it takes a couple of days to show, other times, it takes weeks. Depending on the person and their fate, their peak season is later. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t growing. You just can’t see it.”
I gasp when Dean pulls me onto his lap. He guides my hand against the grass.
“When you put your hand against the soil, you can feel it.” He asks. “A heavy heartbeat despite nothing being there.”
I keep my eyes on his fingers in between mine.
“That’s what love is.” He curves his fingers to hold my hand.
He’s too much all at once. “I?—”
Dean’s other hand brushes through my long hair. “Take however much time you need with your feelings, Nova. But remember that in the end, I’ll always choose you.” He gently untangles the ends. “Besides, a little overdue love doesn’t scare me. Okay?”
My heart pounds.
I nod. Stupidly.
“Good girl.”
My cheeks burn.
Then I’m up on my feet, his heat gone, and I already miss his hands on me.
Pressing my palms to my cheeks, I can’t help myself.
How easily he pulled me down.
His warmth.
Him.
“Somebody fucked you to Thursday.”
Think of a mix between a gasp and a squawk because that’s what comes out of my mouth.
“What happened tohi?Hello? Good morning?” I rub my chest. Hina’s staring at me with unblended foundation creasing her face.
It only deepens when she smirks. “I’m not the one walking in here biting her lip and blushing.” She drops her brush and turns away from the vanity mirror to face me. “Tell me you dropped your panties for Dean.”
“Girl,” I shake my head with a chuckle. “There was no…strenuousactivity.”
“Then why the hell are you blushing,” she whines then stops. “Wait, is it because he went down on you and allowed you to enjoy the ride?”
An image ofthatsteals my breath.
“God, Hina.” I choke on nothing. “You needGod.”
“Pssst,” she clacks her tongue. “What I need is toalsoget laid, but here I am living vicariously through you.”
