He’s about to stand, but something in me cracks.
“Wait.”
I wince at how ridiculous I sound. My fingers tighten around my gym bag, and Kai notices. His eyes narrow slightly.
“I know I messed up. I know we should’ve made our feelings for you more clear,” I start, gripping the towel across my neck like it’s suddenly the most interesting thing in the world. “We didn’t check in with you, and that’s on us. But I…”
Kai’s eyes flick up lazily from the bench press, pinning me in place without saying a word.
It’s infuriating how much ground he gains just by existing.
I roll my shoulders back, squaring them under his gaze. “I’ve been thinking about you,” I continue, voice rougher than I intended. “A lot. More than is probably healthy for a grown man.”
Kai leans against the weight rack, crossing his arms. I can see the muscles shift beneath his shirt, annoyingly distracting, but I stay focused.
“And?” he prompts, like he’s flipping through a boring magazine.
I exhale through my nose, my jaw tightening. This is already going spectacularly.
“And I miss you,” I admit. The words come out gruff, like they’re being dragged kicking and screaming. “There. Happy?”
Kai’s face doesn’t move, his gaze steady and unwavering.
“You don’t seem like the flowers-and-apology-card type,” I add, scrubbing the back of my neck. “So I skipped the bouquet.”
That gets me one raised brow. Progress, I suppose.
“You sure about that, Julian?” His voice drops lower, deliberate.
I nod, stepping closer. “Yeah. I’m sure.”
His gaze drifts over me, slow and deliberate. I know the look. It’s the same one he gave me that first night with Sophie. Except this time, he’s letting me sweat.
I sigh, letting the towel drop around my shoulders. “Listen,” I say, dropping my tone a notch. “I’m not great at this, feelings and all that. Let’s blame the ADHD, but it’s probably just because I’m kind of an arsehole, okay? So if you’re waiting for me to get down on one knee and deliver some long, heartfelt monologue, you’ll be sorely disappointed. My ego can’t take that hit.”
Kai’s lips twitch at the corner, but he doesn’t give me the satisfaction of a full smile.
I narrow my eyes. “See, that’s the problem right there. You love this, don’t you?”
“Love what?” he replies smoothly.
“Watching me grovel.”
“Maybe,” he says, and his voice is a little too casual.
I huff out a dry laugh, shaking my head. “Jesus Christ.”
For a second, neither of us says anything. The weight of the last month lingers between us, heavier than the barbell resting on the rack.
When I finally look at him, there’s no humor left in my voice.
“I do mean it,” I say quietly. “I miss you, Kai. Sophie does too. This thing without you—” I gesture vaguely. “It’s not working. We’re not working. And I know I handled it poorly. I should’ve gone after you. I should’ve called.Something.Truth be told, I wanted to give you space. And I’m here now, feeling like a complete fucking fool. So if you want to make me sweat a little longer, fine. But just… don’t walk away again.”
Kai’s eyes tighten, and I catch it—brief, but there.
“I should make you sweat,” he says, though his voice lacks conviction. “I’d pay to see more of this horrible groveling.”
I step closer, just enough to invade his space. He doesn’t move away.
