“I brought you guys some pizza,” he says, setting the box down between us.
A wide grin forms on my face as I glance up at Ez. “Thank you. That was thoughtful.”
“No problem,” he says as his gaze goes to Rya.
I follow his gaze and notice Rya’s head hung low in her own little world, painting her toes.
“Rya,” I say.
“Mmm hmm?” Her head raises with her brows. She looks up at me, then at Ezra, then back down at the pizza. “Oh. Thanks, babe.” Her head falls back down, and she continues painting.
“Well, I’ll be in the living room if you guys need anything,” he says, stepping back.
I smile back up at him and watch as he leaves.
I stare at Rya, searching her face for any sign of emotion. She has a blank stare as she paints her toes. I wonder if she is feeling the loss of her best friend, too. Maybe it dawns on her now that things are about to change. She’s so lost in thought, focused on her nails. Is she trying to keep it together? I can’t shake the feeling that she must be thinking about it, too.
“That was nice of Ezra to bring us a pizza,” I say, grabbing the white nail polish.
“It was,” she says with a slight smile.
I twist open the nail polish bottle while looking over at her. “Rya, what’s wrong?” My voice is curious.
Her head pops up, eyes narrowing toward me. “Nothing, why?”
I tilt my head, studying her. “You seem lost in thought.”
One of her eyebrows shoots up. “Do I?”
“Yes,” I say, watching her hesitate before she goes back to painting her toes.
She passes a stroke of the brush along her toenail. “I’m just concentrating on painting my toes.”
“Are you worried about how this is all going to affect our friendship?”
“Ugh. Yeah,” she mutters, swallowing the lump in her throat.
“Me too,” I admit. “But Ez is right. I can’t stay because of the history we have if he’s going to be treating me this way.”
She doesn’t respond right away but then says, “I know. You need to do what’s best for you.”
“If it helps, I don’t want to lose you. I hope you guys choose me if sides have to be picked,” I say with a small giggle, as if I’m joking, but I’m really not. That’s one thing that’s been lingering in my mind.
Her eyes meet mine, a flicker of sadness behind her hazel-green eyes. “I don’t want to lose you either.”
I stand in my kitchen, my eyes drifting over the familiar space. Everything looks the same, yet somehow different. It all feels like I’m stepping into territory that’s not mine and I was only gone for a weekend.
The silence presses in around me. It’s always quiet when I’m home alone, but this silence feels different. It’s the silence that makes you overthink and run scenarios in your head. Usually I turn on music, but right now music doesn’t even feel like it will be enough.
I wrap my arms around myself, as if that will shield me from the sadness. My body jolts at the ice maker dropping ice into the ice machine. I let out a heavy breath. My nerves are shot. Every little sound makes me jump.
My phone pings, and again I jolt, making my heart race.
Ashley: Hey girl! Just wanted to check in with you. See how you’re doing? I haven’t seen you at the studio.
A warmth spreads through my chest as I read over her message.
Violet: Things got worse.
