I frown. “You’re not supposed to change yourself for a boy. Or a girl, in your case. You’re supposed to change yourself foryou. Or for the good of the world. One of those.”
“I’ll hit them all to be safe. Two thirds for me, two thirds for the world, and two thirds for a girl.”
“You didn’t used to be funny,” I observe. “Like, at all.”
“I didn’t used to be funnyaround you,” he corrects. “I’ve always been hilarious.”
I snort, then pull out my phone to dial Ruby, putting it on speakerphone while it rings.
“We’re not supposed to be on our phones during work hours,” Mr. Hilarious says.
“I’m on my break,” I declare. “You are, too.” I take his sandwich tray away from him, setting it on the back counter. No sandwiches, no work.
“Who’s on break?” Ruby asks.
“Your brother and me. Listen, would you describe Roman as ‘hilarious?'”
“No,” she says. “Next question.”
Roman rolls his eyes. “You can’t ask my sister if I’m hilarious. What little sister thinks her big brother is funny?”
“Me,” I answer. “Sol’s the funniest man I know.”
“Put Will on the phone,” Roman grumbles. “We’ll ask him.”
The line shuffles, then Will says, “Yello!”
“Will,” I greet. “Would you say Roman is ‘hilarious?'”
“Absolutely yes,” he says. Roman smirks. “One time, when we were in high school, we were supposed to do these ice breakers, right? And so we go around the circle and everyone’s telling their fun fact about themselves, and it gets to Roman, andhe just says, straight-faced, ‘No.’” Will laughs. “‘No.’ That’s it. I was dying.”
Roman’s smirk drops.
“Very funny,” I agree drily. “I can barely contain myself.”
Will’s laughter dies off, and he says, “Maybe you had to be there.”
“You got any examples that don’t involve me having to be there? I’m not very good at time travel.”
“Hmm…” he thinks. “Well… there was that time when… oh, but then… uh…”
The longer he thinks, the redder Roman’s face gets. Nowthat’shilarious.
“Dude, are you serious?” Roman asks. “I’m funny!”
“Of course you are,” Ruby placates. “Which is why we can think of so many instances of you being just that.”
“We’re hanging up,” he says. “We have to call someone else.”
“Mom and Dad’s opinions on this matter don’t count,” she deadpans.
“Goodbye,” he grits.
“Bye, Roman! Love you!” Will says.
“Love you!” Ruby echoes.
“Love you,” Roman grumps. “Bye.” And then he hangs up.
