My fingers curled inward. I hadn’t been lying when I said Casteel wasn’t my focus right now. I could compartmentalize. I would’ve been able to, even if I hadn’t seen him before I left. But talking about him wasn’t helping. Especially with Attes, his great-grandfather, who may or may not have been in love with a much, much older and different version of me.
Gods, I had so many questions about all of that. Not the love part, just everything else.
I peeked over at him, then quickly looked away when his head started to turn. I clamped my mouth shut. Now wasn’t the time to walk down forgotten memory lane.
“What?” Attes asked.
“Nothing.”
“You want to say something,” he replied as he ran a hand over one of the daggers strapped to his chest.
“Are those daggers made of Ancient bone?”
He frowned. “One is. There’s not enough of that bone to go around for more.” He paused. “And I seriously doubt that’s what you wanted to ask.”
“How would you know?”
He went silent, dropping his hand.
“Because you know me—orknewme? Or, at least, a version of me, I guess.” My lips pursed as we walked under some bare branches that rubbed together like dry bones. “Gods, that sounds weird to say out loud.”
“Yeah.” He sighed. “You remember nothing about that time? I know there was a chance you did as a child.”
“I could’ve remembered much more as a child, but anyone I could ask is dead.” Except for Millicent. She had been aroundwhen I was young. “I only remember bits—like seeing your face, flashes of other people, and…other things.”
“Other things?”
“Yes.” I could feel his stare on me. “How did we know each other?”
“Not sure if this is the time for that.”
“What better time is there?”
“Literally any other time,” he replied wryly.
I sighed. “Whatever.”
The breeze picked up, and the scent increased. It wasn’t just a sweeter smell. It was sickly-sweet with a metallic tinge. I had a feeling I knew what it was.
“I met you—I mean, Sotoria—when Kolis brought her back the first time,” he said, and my gaze cut to him. “He…trusted others to be around her then. To guard her when he couldn’t.”
I opened my mouth, then closed it. Then I laughed. It sounded harsh. What did I say to that? Where did I start? “And you were one of those guards?”
“I was.” He sighed heavily. “We became acquainted.”
“And you didn’t see anything wrong with what Kolis was doing?” I asked before I could stop myself. “While you were becoming acquainted?”
A muscle ticked in his temple. “I never said that.”
“Then why didn’t you do something?” I demanded.
His silver eyes flashed to mine. “I never said I didn’t.”
I stared at him, my gaze traveling over too-familiar features and lingering on the scar. What came out of my mouth was something I’d never thought to ask. “How did you get that scar?”
“How did you get yours?”
“Craven,” I answered. “I was a child when my father and…when the people I was with were attacked.”
