I’d hoped our victories would help Leona, ease her fears or make her open up a little bit more. Killing Lucchese and his sons had legitimized us in a new way, and I thought she’d be relieved and happy. The men were saying her name with pride now instead of disbelief.
But it didn’t.
Her nightmares were getting worse.
She’d wake up screaming. She’d complain about feeling frozen, so we’d pile more blankets on top of her. I’d think we’d all fall back asleep, but then in the morning, I’d find her in Obi’s bed. He texted us all that she wouldn’t tell him anything, but she’d at least sleep.
The rest of us were trying to find the balance between supporting her, giving her space, and showing her we wanted her, but she was so up and down. Ciel told us she didn’t feel wanted, which broke my fucking heart, but then when I tried to talk to her about it, she laughed me off and said she was feeling better.
We’d kissed a few times, and she’d done the same with the other guys, but I’d still feel her body stiffen and her hands grip me just a little tighter, so I’d pull away. Something still wasn’t right, and I had no idea what to do about it.
I’d promised myself I wouldn’t push her. It would just make things worse. I’d give herself the time to process what happened on the ship and tell us the truth on her own terms.
But if things were getting worse anyway, what was I supposed to do?
I had to think of something.
I let the water run over my face, praying that maybe the answers would fall out of the showerhead and smack me in the nose.
When nothing came, I shut off the water and stepped out. I was just wrapping a towel around my waist when my phone buzzed on the bathroom counter.
My lips pulled down in a frown while I read the message.
I threw on some clothes, hastily towel drying my hair, before heading into the living room.
Ciel sat at the kitchen island eating some dinner while playing a game on his phone. It was already past 8 p.m. I wasn’t sure where the rest of the guys were, but I thought I saw Ryuji heading down to the gym when I got home earlier.
“Do you know where Leona is?” I asked.
He pointed his fork toward the hallway. “I think she’s in the library working.” I sighed. She needed to rest. “Why? Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, I just need to talk to her,” I replied. “Thanks, Ciel.”
“I’m going to make some food for Wynn,” he called after me. “Do you want anything?”
“I’m fine!” I called back just as I got to the closed library doors.
I knocked and poked my head in. She sat at Obi’s desk, legscrossed with a blanket over her lap, while she typed on her laptop. She looked up and smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes.
“Hey,” she said.
“Hey yourself.” I walked in and pulled the door shut behind me. “What are you working on?”
“VCI stuff,” she replied. “One of our vendors is changing, so it alters the route Anton needs to take through Arizona and New Mexico to Texas. I’m trying to plot a better alternative.”
Her eyes floated back to the computer screen, and that little wrinkle appeared between her eyebrows. I leaned on the desk and reached out to smooth it. Her eyes closed with a heavy sigh.
“I have something to tell you if you can spare some minutes for your lowly bodyguard,” I said softly.
She laughed. “Only if it’s something good.” When I didn’t immediately reply, she shot to her feet. The blanket fell to the ground. “What is it, Cas?”
I grabbed her hands and pulled her against my chest. Her fingers trembled. “Hey, it’s fine. Nothing’s wrong, okay? Take a breath.”
She blinked, inhaling and exhaling. “Don’t scare me like that.”
“I wasn’t trying to.” I brushed my thumb over her cheek. “It’s technically good news.”
“Okay,” she said cautiously. “Then what is it?”
