After we both wrapped our hands and stretched, we sparred for at least an hour. I was still building up to my old strength and stamina, and I knew he was taking it easy on me, but it feltgood.
We both were still constantly aware of Leona—missing her, fearing for her—but being able to focus my brain on something else felt like I could finally take a breath.
I raised a hand to pause our latest bout. My leg ached, and my shoulder was starting to feel sore. Ryuji nodded while I slowly sat down on the edge of the mat. After making a trip to the mini-fridge in the corner, he sat down next to me.
“You were right,” he said, out of nowhere. He handed me a water bottle, and I downed the entire thing. Sparring with him was intense; he was so fucking quick on his feet.
“I love hearing you finally admit that,” I replied. He snorted. “But right about what? What are you talking about?”
He looked at the ground, elbows resting on his knees. “All those times you said we should be the ones protecting her. All those times you went on and on about keeping her safe.” His face split into a pained frown. “You were right.”
My heart felt like it was cracking in two, because as much as I missed her and wanted her back in our arms as soon as possible, I also knewhewas the reason I believed we’d get her back. They were all the reason I felt so strongly that she would survive.
I had been wrong to be so overprotective. Yes, she’d been taken, but if I’d had my way and didn’t let her prepare herself…
They were the reason I wasn’t melting down right now.
“No,” I responded, shaking my head. “You’re the reason she’s going to live. You all made her strong enough to get back to us.”
His lips pressed together, and he hung his head in his hands. “Fuck.I feel like I can’t fucking breathe. I’m going insane with worry. I can’t sleep; I can’t eat. I just want to fucking murdersomething. I can’t stop thinking about what they’re doing to her on that ship.”
I nudged his shoulder slightly, staring at my feet. “I know.”
“If anything has happened to her—” his voice broke.
I grasped his shoulder. “Ciel will find her. And then we’ll get her back.”
He nodded. “And then we’ll never let her leave this penthouse ever again.”
I considered it for a moment. As soon as we got her back, we could keep her here, away from our enemies, safe and secure. We could run the Family and expand our empire and achieve all our goals without her ever stepping foot outside his penthouse.
But she wouldn’t want that. She’d hate it. She’d been locked up enough at the Vero estate. It would be a tragedy to do it again.
“Now you’re sounding a little too much like me,” I said with a chuckle. “She hates being caged.”
He was quiet for a moment before he groaned and clutched at his chest. “I don’t know how you’re doing it, bodyguard. I’m a fucking wreck.”
My mouth pulled up into a sad smile. “We both love her too much.”
I knew he loved her. And seeing how close he was to collapsing made me look at him completely differently than I had when we first met. His feelings for her were genuine.
“I guess we do.” He met my eyes briefly before rubbing the back of his neck. “If this is what love feels like, I don’t fucking want it.”
“Yes, you do,” I said with a scoff. “Don’t be an idiot.”
He exhaled a heavy breath and went silent.
“I almost lost her before, when everything went down with the Family and the engagement,” I spoke after a few quiet moments. “I almost pushed her away because I was too afraid of losing her. I will never get that close again. This didn’t happen to her because we weren’t careful enough. This happened becausethere are bad fucking people out there—enemies—who would clearly do anything to hurt us. She’s strong enough to face those enemies head on, and so are we.”
He stared across the room, gazing into space. “I think I liked it better when you were an overprotective asshole.”
I barked a laugh. “Why?”
“It was easier to hate you.”
My mouth pulled up at the corner. “Sorry for the inconvenience of making you like me. And sorry that I’m always right, and you’re always wrong.”
“Apology not accepted.”
