“Non, non, non!” I protest. “You should have your date. I...I don’t want to sound rude, but I think maybe I’d just like an evening alone.”
Kay gives me a scrutinizing look. “Are you just saying that? Because seriously, it’s not a big deal for me to cancel. I don’t want you to have to be on your own after all that.”
“Really,” I urge, “I’d like the thinking time. There’s this cafe downtown I wanted to go to, maybe do some reading, people watch, stare out at the streets of Chicago and contemplate my life...”
I’m glad the mood has lightened enough for Kay to laugh at my joke.
“You’re sure?” she says one final time, and I do my best to convince her. “Well in that case, I better get going. You okay to get to that cafe by yourself?”
“I’ll Uber,” I tell her.
I don’t end up going. Once Kay leaves, I take the remaining wine with me into the bathroom and fill up the tub. There are some decorative candles out in the main room, and I set them up beside the sink before hunting around for my lighter.
Thesnicksound when I click it brings up a pang of that old craving for nicotine, but I do my best to ignore it as I strip out of my clothes and hit the lights before lowering myself into the bath. I settle back and close my eyes, imaging the arches of St. Patrick’s Basilica swooping high above me and pretending the light from its stained glass windows is falling across my skin as I close my eyes to think.
