7Time is Running Out || Muse
COLE
The guysand I wait in Mona’s office as she finishes up a phone call in the hall. We’re going over pre-tour stuff today before we pack up and leave Montreal at the end of the week. I don’t know why we have to have so many meetings every time we head out on the road, but Matt likes to make sure we’re involved with all band-related decisions.
He’s takingnotestoday, for fuck’s sake. With an actual notebook.
“So about Roxanne...” Matt begins. I knew this was coming. It’s the first time we’ve all been together in person since I let them know Roxy will be doing the tour. “Does this mean you’re back together?”
“Or at least boning down?” JP adds.
I glare at them.
“We’re about to spend the summer living in a bus together,” Ace drawls. “We’re going to have to clear this up, whether you like it or not.”
I try to freeze them out, but there’s no escaping. The couch is way too small for four guys, and JP is so close he’s practically sitting in my fucking lap.
“Soooo...?” he prompts and then starts making the universal sign for dick-in-vagina with his hands.
“Tabarnak, stop doing that,” I tell him. “No, okay? We’re not back together. She doesn’t want to get back together. She wants to use the tour as time for us to like...work shit out and find a long-term solution.”
JP makes a face. “That does not sound fun.”
“So that’s whatshewants,” Matt cuts in, crossing his ankles and leaning against the arm of the couch so he can watch me like he’s Sigmund Fucking Freud or something. “But what doyouwant?”
JP nudges me and starts up his sexual hand gestures again.
“What I want is for you to all stop being dickheads.”
“I think JP is more of a dickhandright now,” Ace retorts.
“If he didn’t have Molly to prove me wrong, I’d say he’s always a dickhand,” Matt joins in.
Just another day in the life of a platinum-selling rock band.
“You obviously want her back,” Matt continues, “and you’re obviously shit at managing that yourself, so—”
“So we go fucking Navy SEAL on this shit!” JP shouts, jumping up from the couch. “We go full stealth and help you get back together.Opération:voulez-vous coucher avec Cole ce soir.”
“That is disturbing,” I tell him. “Also, she outlawed sleeping together on this tour because she doesn’t want it to be about us hooking up.”
It takes me by surprise when the three of them all burst out laughing. Ace is cracking up so hard he actually slaps his knee.
“What?” I demand.
They just keep howling until Matt finally calms down enough to speak.
“Sorry, but no way in hell is that actually happening.”
“It’s different this time,” I protest. “This isn’t about fucking, or even dating. I’m...I’m losing her. I just have this feeling that this is the last shot, you know? If I screw this up...”
If I screw this up, I lose the only chance I’ve ever had to feel something real. There’s no take two for this. There’s no second choice. There’s never going to be another Roxanne.
I realize the room has gone so silent I can hear the humming of Mona’s laptop charger. I’ve hardly ever talked about Roxy like this in front of the guys. I’m not the kind of person who goes around dumping my shit on everyone. My jaw clamps like I can bite back the words and swallow them down again.
“You’re not gonna screw it up,” Matt says quietly. “She’s too important.”
Thankfully, Mona gets off her phone call just then and saves us from the weight of a conversation that was getting way to fucking heavy. We move on to reviewing tour dates and transportation arrangements, but I can still feel Matt’s eyes on me.
