We continue, falling back into silence, and I keep half an eye on the edge of the trees, now more wary of them as we walk.
It might be a mile later when we come to a small clearing, just like Ten said, and in the centre, a huge flat rock, with two spindles of granite, or something equally as hard and rough, on either side.
It summons a terrifying image in my mind—of a sacrifice. Laid bare and vulnerable on that stone.
A hush, unnatural and eerie, descends, as if everything alive in the vicinity knows this is a place of deep importance and revered.
“Am I bound?” My throat bobs.
“Sorry?” Ten checks, his eyes flashing at me.
“Am I bound? Tied to the two columns on the stone.”
“No. Of course not.” He steps towards me, his brows creasing. “You’ll stand in the middle.” He nods. “But you go into this freely. With your Advocate.” He straightens, and I see him stiffen.
So, his issue around the Transference is the Advocate.
I step forward and continue to walk around the stone table. Something in me, something inquisitive, reaches my hand forward, and I trail my fingers over the stone.
Cold. Darkness. Screaming. Pain.
I snap it away.
For a second. Less. My mind fills with a poison travelling from the tip of my fingers where I touched the stone, straight to my heart.
“Ever?”
My eyes stare at the plinth as if the whole history of Kirrasia has bled into the very particles of the rock, now desperate to be free. To escape.
My stomach churns, and dread pours through my veins.
“Ever?”
I look up, and Ten is mere inches from me. “What is it?”
“Nothing. It’s fine. Thank you for bringing me here.” My smile is forced.
“What did you see? What can you do?”Ten’s questions are quiet, almost soft inside my mind, and they pull all my attention, even if I’m frightened of the answer myself. The coldand darkness slip away as I fight to hear more of his thoughts. I concentrate, still not sure if that was me or him who opened the door.
Touch. Lips. Fear. Desire.
Words scatter through my brain, a jumble of feelings and thoughts, like the images that ran freely through it when we touched. But we’re not touching.Did we just?
“We should get back.” He turns away.
“Don’t.” I start reaching for him, but I pull back my hand. “Don’t push me away again. I don’t know if that was me or you, but I know it’s not something I can control.” I’m assuming he either felt or saw the other side of what I did. “Please, Ten. I don’t know what’s happening to me or if this is normal or not, but either way, can we go back to how it was when we were watching the sky?” I exhale, finishing my splurge of words. “And I’m sorry I took Calix’s hand if that’s still irking you, but if I take yours, I don’t know if either of us will still be standing after, and I’m terrified that I might hurt you.” My heart pounds, racing, and I don’t care about showing him how vulnerable I feel. I don’t want him to turn away from me.
“Hey, hey, hey. Breathe. Come on. Two more days. You can do this.”
I slump forward. “You say that as if everything will magically be fixed, then.”
“It will be. Or at least you’ll feel more in control. It’s like your magic is surging, coming and going, maybe. It will be easier once you’ve been through the Transference.” He smiles. “You’re not losing your mind, Ever. I promise you that.” He adds the last bit, and I’m grateful he does, reminding me that he still remembers our conversation and what I asked of him.
At least it won’t be so intimidating now. I try and focus on the positive as Ten walks us back. However, I can’t shake the images and feelings that seeped into me from just touching the stone.There’s a haunting feeling—like a shadow—just out of sight—every time I think back to that clearing and the stone. Ten said the forest was a place of myth and magic. What about the spot where every single person in Kirrasia has gone through their Transference? What memories are in that stone?
The morning of my Transference arrives, and Kyra wakes me. There’s been so much leading up to this day, and I anticipated little sleep, but she still has to pull me awake. There’s no training because of the preparations, and Kirrians all participate in one way or another.
She helps me bathe and sets out the gown she’s chosen, which is beautiful but ridiculously grand with multiple colours depicting the Orders in embroidered threads covering the bodice. It sweeps into a simple silhouette that doesn’t make me want to hide under a shirt. She’s even laid out my training boots, perhaps for fun, but I choose to believe we’ve come to know each other enough that it’s her way of showing me a compromise.
